Pardon my cursing, but seriously…what was I thinking? This refrain has gone through my head many times since I started purging my wardrobe. Now that I’m really finished, I thought I better try and learn as much as I can from those WTF purchases to prevent them happening again. Thing is, it’s easy – I know EXACTLY why I bought what I bought, when I bought them.
I was under the influence
I bought the Madewell Erin booties (seen here & here) on a trip to Austin right after Ozzie died (my dog of 14 years) and while I was out shopping with a friend. It was cold, I was still sad, but trying to get some relief for a while, and I’d been looking for a pair of ankle booties forEVER. So I bought them, even though they’re brown, and they’re a more Western style than I usually like. I did get them for 20% off, but still…they were $175 and I only wore them twice. My friend loved them, and convinced me that brown is great with gray (it is) and that I’d regret it if I didn’t get them. I agreed with her, and honestly, really did love them, but that love faded quickly. And damn, don’t I wish I had that $175 back!!! But sunk costs…
I pulled them out recently while going through shoes to purge, and thought WTF? And then I thought maybe I’d try to get them dyed black or gray, but even so, don’t think I’d wear them enough to make it worthwhile; they’re just not my style, and I’d rather wear my Everlane loafers now.
I fell in love
After I lost weight, I literally fell in LOVE with everything I put on my body, and wanted to buy it all. I did buy a lot of it. So specifically after Ozzie died, I was shopping as a diversion, would try stuff on that actually FIT, and fall in love with how it looked on me (through grief-and-lonely-colored lenses), then buy it.
Exactly what happened with the Madewell booties; I thought I finally found a pair I could wear and that looked good with my thicker calves. I did…but again, I’m not the ankle bootie type. As much as I want to be, and as much as I LOVE ankle booties on other women, I just don’t love them on me. Even a “shootie” type like the Madewell version isn’t really my style. Well, maybe if they were black…but I don’t think so.
I fell for “every woman needs _________”
I think I’m finally over this one, thinking that I should have everything that “every woman needs” even if I don’t like the style on me. Chambray shirt anyone?? Ankle booties? (sold my Rag & Bone harrow booties recently) Denim jacket, leather jacket (my Veda Max jacket is on eBay)??
So, the denim jacket is the last holdout…I did really want a denim jacket, and when I tried on the Joe’s Jeans oversized jacket I fell in love, AND I thought “finally! a denim jacket for ME!” And yes, I love it, but I don’t wear it. Turns out, denim jackets aren’t really my style. I like the idea. And I love denim jackets on other women, but I’m more of a cardigan or black slouchy blazer type gal.
It was cheap/on sale/discounted/”free”
This gets me every time. Or used to. I got the Madewell booties because they were new, and I had a 20% off coupon. I did like them, but I was obviously clouded by the discount. And the denim jacket I got with credits at Shopbop – not ‘free’ exactly, because I earn those credits, but I didn’t have to hand over any cash, which made it easier to stomach spending more than $200 on something I wasn’t really even sure of. **more on this tomorrow in The Minimal Closet…
These are the last holdouts. My closet is officially purged. I still have a box of things I’m saving for a spring/summer purge if I don’t wear them, and a box of things I’m taking to share with family over Thanksgiving, but this is it. I don’t have anything else to get rid of. Whoa. Now what?? Haha. I guess I’ll figure that out.
In the mean time, if you’re interested in either the Madewell booties or the denim jacket here are more details:
Madewell Erin booties (SOLD!!): size 7 (the fit my size 8 foot okay when I bought them, they feel a little snug now, but I’m still recovering from summer feet), only worn twice, asking $90 including free domestic USPS priority mail shipping. Here’s a listing on eBay so you can get a better look at the shoes. I can also send more pictures if you’re interested, and email me to grechen (at) grechenmedia.com
Joe’s Jeans oversized dolman denim jacket : size small, worn a couple of times, in perfect condition. Here’s the “new” distressed version on Joe’s Jeans site (ugh… I really love it!!), and an outfit on me (mine is darker, not distressed). I’m asking for $75 including domestic USPS priority mail shipping.
Contact me – grechen(at)grechenmedia.com if you’re interested in either of these pieces before I put them on ebay.
And, what are your WTF was I thinking items? Have you purged them? Are you still holding out hope that you’ll wear them??
I had bought some harem-y / slouchy 10 Crosby by Derek Lam pants on sale online. Of course they were non-returnable. Pants with pleating at the waist need to be really drapey and soft or they look awful on me. These were terrible on me, and I felt terrible wearing them, and I even convinced myself that if I hemmed them to remove the band at the bottom they would work–but it made them worse. I kept them around far longer than anything else that I never wore, and I finally just had to send them to Goodwill because I couldn’t resell them.
So–no buying things that are final sale if I haven’t tried them on, and just admit to myself that certain styles just don’t work on me, and I would rather not wear them, and stop buying things in that style. I am hoping that my worst WTF shopping moments are behind me. 😉
Your timing is impeccable! I do this all the time! It’s maddening! And I JUST bought two pairs of Frye boots (in different colors so I can decide at home, only going to keep one) and I REALLY love them, but I worry I will not love them later! And they were expensive.
Or sometimes I have the opposite happen: where I don’t buy something because I’m worried about spending and then I regret not buying them! Thanks for the great post!
Newish reader, first time commenter. As a 37-year old new mom, I highly relate to your shopping style and ‘inner voice’. I’ve always been obsessed with clothes and shopping and finding what’s right for me…but now that I have a baby it’s been a weird transition into need slightly different clothing…still office friendly, but able to allow me to crawl around on the ground – ha! Anyway, my recent WTF purchase is the Eileen Fisher wedge dress. On my apple body type. Oy! Not good. But I love EF and though I’m can’t REALLY afford her stuff yet, I’m hunting it out on Ebay. Which means I can’t try before I buy. So yeah. Don’t know what I was thinking 🙁
xo
Lenore
Lenore Hume´s last blog post ..The Sakura Bloom Sling Diaries Volume V – Audition
I cannot praise the KonMari method enough for both closet purging and evaluating new purchases.
http://www.amazon.com/Life-Changing-Magic-Tidying-Decluttering-Organizing/dp/1607747308/ref=sr_1_sc_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1414606162&sr=1-1-spell&keywords=kon+mari
I bought the Kindle version and devoured it. I implemented the advice to tough each of your clothes and ask yourself whether they “spark joy.” Woo-woo stuff, but surprisingly informative. I was previously pretty minimalist, I thought, but I just donated four bags of clothes and consigned another 25 items. I am reasting before i tackle the rest of my “minimal” belongings.
The clothes you bought, she would say, may have sparked joy when you bought them, but they no longer do. They have taught you somethings. Now you may release them!
you and me both 🙂
it’s a really hard thing to come to terms with though, realizing certain styles just don’t work on you. i mean…every time i see someone wearing a chambray shirt i think i need one. still! even after buying and returning/selling so many 😉
now, i will just NOT buy anymore. period. stick to what works, and what i love on me, and in my wardrobe. resist that pull…
oh…that’s a hard one too. i guess if i keep thinking about something for so long but i’ve completely missed out on it, i’ll look for it on eBay (like with the JP skirt I just got), but otherwise, i find that i forget about it most of the time, and move on to something else. i’m pretty fickle sometimes 😉
which frye boots did you get?
thanks for your comment lenore! eBay scares me anyway, i don’t think i would buy something i didn’t know would work on me…(hadn’t tried it on first) – i freak out now about having to return things anyway. especially with online shopping. so i try to find whatever i’m looking for in person first…
Haha I love this post (and I kind of like those shoes actually, although they are also too Western for my style).
My WTF item, after falling prey to the “everyone should have this!” shtick a couple years ago, is a denim jacket. Specifically, it is a slightly faded, fitted, shrunken denim jacket from American Eagle. It sat in my closet for probably two full years, with the tag on, until I finally forced myself to wear it the other night. I thought it looked very cute (jean jacket, white tank, printed skirt, and Toms) although maybe a tiny bit young. Like you, I tend to reach for a cardigan or something softer if I need a cover-up kind of layer. For the meantime I plan to keep the jacket and try to wear it a few more times. I like variety in my wardrobe so I will see if I enjoy wearing it now that the weather is cooling down a bit. 😉
Last year, I was feeling like my style was too tailored, so I decided to buy a bunch of billowy, slouchy tops. Unfortunately, that style did not work for me– I felt like I was swimming in loose blankets or something.
I now realize that although I love softness and drape, I am most comfortable when I feel like my clothes are “hugging” me. So I’m back to wearing fitted (not tight) but soft clothes.
I know that the current fashion is looser than what I tend to wear, so I’m adding “drape” with scarves and cardigans and a slouchy handbag.
Oh, and yes, I had a chambray shirt that I “watched” on the J Crew web site for months. When I finally bought it on sale, I tried it on and th0ught, “why in the world did I want this”? It didn’t go with anything else in my wardrobe. I think I just loved it on the catalog model and I thought it would suit me like it did her! I never wore the shirt and it was eventually donated to charity (new with tags!)
One trick I have heard is good is to make a list of what you want to buy, and wait 30 days to buy it. If you still want it after 30 days, go ahead and get it. Some things may sell out but really, most things are still available in 30 days.
Pinterest boards have helped me with some of this–though they also sometimes serve to fuel buying.
Most recent “wtf” item: final sale linen pants without trying them on from J.Crew. They totallly do not fit. But, I was like, “gosh, so cheap!” but i will probably be using my amex card’s policy to get a refund on it. THank goodness for Amex 🙂
Oh yes… I have had a few of these types of purchases enter my closet over the years too. We all make a few bad decisions, but look at you realizing what and most importantly WHY you did it. Now that you know why you did it you will be better off the next time some major life event occurs. I.e. you can prevent it from occurring again.
Ashley Gailey´s last blog post ..Black, Denim & Plaid
final sale items are evil 😉
oh this is good! better than my 24-hour rule i think…
so good that you’re adding drape in your own way! i love that!!
i still have days where i want my clothes to “hug” me – and then days where i don’t…that’s why i have a lot of trouble packing for travel!!
good that you’re still trying it out. i don’t have the patience for that lately!! i’m being so brutal with my purging. i don’t think i’ll regret it later, so far, i haven’t!! i feel like i’ve given it enough of a chance. with me, if i don’t wear something immediately, and a lot, when i first buy it, i know it’s a dud…
Frye Patty Artisan in black and a dark grey, not sure which color to keep. They are amazing with bare legs and dresses! I can’t wait to wear them!
I have a two week window, if I don’t wear them within that, they go back. But I have to have them at home to try them on with all my outfits, I can never decide at the store, too stressful!
NICE boots!!
i’m with you on trying stuff at home. i have to do that too…
I think the answer is to know your own style (but that takes a while) and also be ruthless–do you love it or not? If you don’t love it, don’t buy/keep it.
Although, if you you work in an office with a strict dress code, you might have to wear stuff you don’t LOVE, but it’s stuff you NEED, especially if you’re on a budget.
Knowing your style takes experimentation, though. And then something happens (you move, have a baby switch jobs) and you need to start all over again …
This post made me laugh out loud. Okay, here’s my own recent wtf list: 1. linen pants on sale that were too large, 2. another olive green top and 3. Frye boots that didn’t fit right. I could come up with many more, but I’ll save that for another post;).
yes. this is almost where i am right now, being ruthless, anyway, and i do feel like i know my style, although i wish it was something other than just “james perse”…although it could be worse!
Let’s see….jackets that I know won’t fit me based on my current size, ditto for jeans, a Chanel-esque jacket (because every woman should have one, right? 😉 ), high heels that I can no longer wear due to foot problems….oh, and duplicates. Feeling kind of like I just lost a few IQ points…