A little over a year ago my journey towards a more “minimal closet” was featured in the WSJ (I’m still pinching myself, honestly). Many posts and all this time later, where am I on my journey? Is my closet “minimal?” What has changed, and what hasn’t?
If you read with any regularity at all, you know I’ve struggled quite a bit recently, trying to figure things out amidst life changes (what else is new??). Ultimately, I’ve kept my wardrobe rather small, in spite of adding some new things. And at the end of the day, I’m quite happy with my progress and the momentum going forward, even with all the bumps and detours along the way. Life never goes exactly according to “plan,” does it? (thankfully!) All we can hope for is to learn a little bit along the way…
Minimalism isn’t the answer
I knew this, of course, but still, one can hope for a quick fix, no? As I’ve written before, I thought that once I had all the “perfect” pieces in my wardrobe I’d be content, and never need to shop again. I thought if I got rid of all the excess STUFF in my life, I would never be afraid or feel sad again. I read all the minimalist blogs and saw all the clean, perfect images, meaningful quotes, and thoughtful essays and believed that that could be MY life. If only I pared down, and lived minimally, I would be “happy”. Finally.
Bullshit. It could be that I’m not “happy” because I’m NOT a minimalist (see below), but I don’t think so. Not that I’m not happy. I am. But I am not in that state of blissful freedom and perpetual contented-ness some minimal bloggers live in, or appear to live in, anyway.
I’ve said many times before, what works for some may not work for others. Take capsule wardrobes for example. I find capsule wardrobes anxiety-inducing and a general cop-out for getting to the real hard internal work of coming to terms with an overflowing closet if that’s your concern. But I can only speak for me, and based on my own experience. They work for lots of people, and they may work for you if you try one.
There is NO ONE ANSWER. And there is NO RIGHT ANSWER. The answer is whatever works for you; whatever makes you feel better, content, and like you’re moving in the right direction. The moment you start to move in the wrong direction, shift, and try something new, anything. Maybe maximalism? (I kid…)
I DO believe that the basic message of minimalism – we should live within our means, and consume mostly what we need and some of what we want – holds true, and I aspire to it. I DO now have fewer, better things. And my closet is absolutely minimal compared to where it was a year ago; I know what’s in it and each piece serves a purpose. When/if it doesn’t, I let it go.
So, minimalism is AN answer, but it is not the ONLY answer, nor is it a universal panacea. It felt right to me to move towards having fewer things. I appreciate having less stuff, and love having all my clothes in one place all the time. But don’t believe the minimalist hype, mine or anyone else’s. Embark on your own journey, minimalist or otherwise, figure out what works for you – gets you back in focus.
I am not a Minimalist
In case you haven’t read this post, or haven’t figured out yet, I am not a minimalist. I aspire towards living a more conscious lifestyle with fewer, better, things, but honestly, I abhor labels, so I’m not going to call myself anything. To me, minimalism is about having less (relatively-speaking), it’s not about capsule wardrobes, limited color palettes (although, yes, I do maintain a black/white/gray wardrobe), or depriving oneself of material pleasures.
Perhaps if I had another job, outside of my blogs and my consulting business, I would have a much more streamlined wardrobe. Perhaps not; I have always LOVED clothes, shopping, discovering new designers and interesting pieces. I continue to do what I’ve done for eleven years here on Grechen’s Closet – purchase things on my own and/or receive things from designers to review for you. My mission – my “job,” if you can call something I love so much that – is still to provide honest reviews and real outfit pictures with pieces I appreciate – and think you will too.
Sometimes this means I end up with more things than I need, and eventually most of those things find new homes. And yes, sometimes I do struggle with finding the balance between consuming new and being “content” with what I have. I also make mistakes (ahem. Black Crane culottes). I’m struggling less though, with my own judgment of myself and expectations for my wardrobe than I did earlier in the year, because I’ve come to terms with the fact that I am who I am; I love to shop & share my finds here, it’s as simple as that.
As my journey progressed, and I learned more about my clothes, who makes them, and fashion’s impact on the world, it turns out I was no longer interested in heading towards minimalism for minimalism’s sake, I was focusing more on becoming a conscious shopper; being acutely aware of what I add/keep in my wardrobe and why.
Conscious Shopping
Early on in my journey, my goal WAS to become a minimalist, in my closet first, and then my life. The idea of dressing with only ten items was appealing, once. But along the way, reality set in, and I realized that deprivation wasn’t the right path for me; it was never going to work. What DOES work for me is shifting towards simply being more CONSCIOUS of what I choose to add to my wardrobe and keep in my life.
Again, I’m a shopper. I appreciate things. I want to add fewer and fewer things lately, because I know everything I already have, the holes I need to fill, and I avoid shopping to fill emotional needs as opposed to REAL needs. My goal now, and what I want for everyone, is to simply be present when I shop. Shopping is no longer a passive activity, something I do just to pass the time, or fill an emotional void. I’ve done that, which is how I ended up with so many things I didn’t need.
For me, now, shopping is an active, conscious activity. I enjoy being fully in the moment while I shop. Which means I usually do it alone, and with an end goal in mind. All I aspire to is being more aware of why and what I buy. This also means I pay more attention to where my clothes are made, who makes them, and under what conditions. When I choose to buy something, I do it with my eyes wide open, fully aware of what my choice means to myself, to the environment, and to the people around me.
To be sure, being a more conscious shopper doesn’t always mean that I’m making THE RIGHT choice every time. But that’s not what’s important. I can aspire to making the right choice, whatever that is for me, but for now, I at least want to make a better choice, a more informed choice, and I want to OWN my choice fully & completely.
That is all I ask of myself, and all I can ask of anyone else.
If you’ve been following along this past year, and maybe are on your own journey towards a more minimal closet, what have you learned? What have you accomplished? Where are you now, and how do you feel about your journey?
See The Minimal Closet in the WSJ! Then read more in The Minimal Closet series:
If you’re interested in becoming a more conscious shopper and getting your closet under control, but need a little push, I’m available to help 🙂 Please take a look at my Conscious Closet Consulting services at Grechen Reiter!
LOL Black Crane culottes! Isn’t it crazy how we convince ourselves we love something just because we invested (money, thought, etc) into it? The reason I won’t get eye laser surgery, plastic surgery, or any other major irreversible “purchase” – totally convinced people lie to themselves and others about their degree of satisfaction. That’s the beautiful thing about clothes- take em off, return them, learn and move on 🙂
After months of shopping balance/control I recently succumbed to a bout of retail therapy. Of course it doesn’t take sadness or stress away. And I’m not so sure I like what I bought. Still have tags on them so may go back.
Reading your post today was helpful. Thanks.
yes, thank goodness 🙂
i definitely used to be more like that before this “year of introspection” – holding on to things because i spent so much on them, whether or not i actually LIKED or wore them. now though, the turnaround is pretty quick. sadly, not quick enough always to be able to return things (i seem to need to wear things a couple of times before i’m totally convinced they’re mistakes. i’m working on that…), so i need to sell them, but still. i don’t hold on to things for months or years like i used to.
me too lee – i’ve been on quite the bender the last couple of months. for various reasons, but mostly fear of the unknown, and starting something newish. i feel like i’ve finally conquered the fear though, and can feel the WANTING fading away. but i also ALWAYS shop more leading up to fall. i’m so ready for the weather to change, and I love love love layering for cooler weather, and all the sweaters!!
anyway, hang in there, and focus on now, not the mistakes you made yesterday. fix them if you can, but otherwise, just try to quietly move on 🙂 this is how i get by most of the time…
You’ve brought up so many good points in this post and I especially like when you said..
“we should live within our means, and consume mostly what we need and some of what we want”
I thought that was a powerful quote, because not doing this is why people get into financial trouble .. and it doesn’t even have to do with shopping for clothing… it’s as simply as buying a house you can’t afford or car etc.
I’d like to get my closet down to capsule size .. to see if I can do it, but .. alas, I like to shop! I like to discover new brands and styles, but now I’m doing it a bit less or refocusing my purchases from office wear to exercise wear 🙂
Monica.
Hey, I liked the Black Crane culottes! 🙂
I did too. I loved it in theory and even on me, but I felt disconnected when I wore it. Just not like myself…
Thanks for linking to your post on thredup. I had the same issue with mis-sizing. I just emailed and asked for a partial refund. We shall see…but thanks for the idea.
The chicest person i saw in Paris this summer was wearing a black turtleneck, black culottes, and a black and navy Hermes scarf. I am trying to be brave enough to try some wide-legged cropped pants–I have some older Eileen Fisher ones in my closet.
THANK GOD! I thought something was wrong with me because I couldn’t embrace minimalism and shrink my wardrobe to capsule-size. Don’t get me wrong-I do need to downsize, get rid of the orphans and stop holding on to things because I spent a fortune on them. But Project 333 gave me anxiety. I am more aware of items that I gravitate toward and replace regularly. I know the things I can’t do without. And I am using tee’s and scarves as a way to experiment with color. I have learned how to mix color with my neutrals and that I love grey, even if I’ve been told that I shouldn’t wear it. So there you have it and I am still evolving (wardrobe-wise).
I’m kind of obsessed with having a minimalist wardrobe. It’s not because I think it will complete my life or make me happier but I know I don’t wear everything in my already sparse wardrobe and I get anxiety knowing that items are not being worn. I did a huge purge this year and sold many items that I’ve hung onto because of the amount of money I spent on them. I am also someone that needs to wear new items out for some time before I can decide if it’s truly me or just a passing phase. Usually by the time I’ve made the decision, it’s far too late to return them.
I also love fall/winter clothing and tend to shop more when summer comes to an end. I overshopped from mid-August until now – bought 7 new clothing items and a new bag. I have no excuses either – I didn’t need any replacements, I just loved them all and wanted some new items. Even though I’m already buying a lot less than before, it really takes a lot of self-control to quiet the want in me.
wear them!! i have just decided that i don’t really like wide leg pants/jeans on me. i like the idea of them, and i think i like them once or twice, but i really don’t. and i just never feel like me in them, possibly because i like to actually feel much more held-in than wide-legs afford…
this is why i continue to have/want a pretty minimal closet – i cannot STAND to have things in it that i don’t wear. so lately, when i add things, i take out 4-5 other things. not as a rule, but just as a way to re-asess things. but i’m trying to get better about keeping certain things even if i don’t wear/use them. like, right now i’m kicking myself for selling my burgundy jerome dreyfuss bag because i’m DYING for a burgundy bag for fall…so. live and learn. live and learn 🙂
I had to think about this for a day as it’s been a topic near & dear to me & yet has been haunting me as well. Upfront apologies for the wall of text!
Up until I stumbled across the Marie Kondo “konmari” method of decluttering/organizing, I was only randomly and haphazardly decluttering my home & wardrobe. I’m naturally a tidy person who has always kept my home organized & clean, & I don’t keep out a lot of knick-knacks on horizontal surfaces (cause less clutter means quicker cleaning for me)….it was all the stuff I had kept over the years that was stored away & probably wouldn’t see the light of day ever again that bugged me the most.
Anyways, in late 2013, my husband & I thought we were going to have to move for his job & in prep for that, we downsized, purged, sold, consigned, etc a bunch of stuff we didn’t want to drag with us to another state. It was during this time that I found a bunch of bloggers, You Tubers, and minimalist advocates that gave pretty good advice on finding better ways to dispose of items (aside from just Ebay, Goodwill or the landfill). I ended up really relating to a lot of what these self-proclaimed minimalist were speaking about & I actually started to associate myself with the word minimalism, because I am not opposed to getting rid of stuff if I don’t use it or need it, etc. This is how I found about the Marie Kondo book too.
I tried the Project 333 thing, albeit briefly, and HATED it, but assumed it was a one off thing that just didn’t resonate with me even though I considered myself a minimalist. But then I began to see a lot of my fav bloggers, You Tubers, etc getting rid of stuff in order to reach a certain number. Such as having only 40 items of clothing total. Owning only 2 forks. Keeping only 1 blush. Getting rid of that 1 blush & instead using a lip & cheek stain in order to rid themselves of separate lip & cheek products, etc.
One blogger would get down to 40 clothing items. But the following day, he would get trumped by another blogger who got down to 39 items. All this resetting of the minimalist maximum bar began to not sit well with me. Felt like the underlying theme was a race to achieve the least. I’m so not the race type.
Add to that, lately I’ve noticed my patience getting thin anytime I see the recurring sentiment that pursuing minimalism is so that you can pursue one’s “passions”. I swear to Gawd, if I hear another come lately commenter say “minimalism lets you follow your passions” or quotes William Morris one more freaking time or proclaim the need to have a capsule wardrobe!! I swear!! *shakes fist* ARGH!
I get it in that being the good steward to a house full of stuff can take away from time spent doing something else, but really, if you knew that buying a single-family home with a yard & the maintenance that goes with it wasn’t your thing, then maybe you should’ve bought a condo or rented an apartment instead. Just saying.
I also get it that constantly buying clothing you will never wear eats away at income that could have been invested more wisely. This to me speaks more about keeping better tabs on a budget, if there is even a budget in place to keep tabs on!
Honestly though, I have made some pretty stupid clothing purchases – colors that don’t suit my skin tone, striped anything, wool or cashmere anything (itchy), aspirational items, etc. Konmari’s “sparking joy” is what helped me cull those items, but trying to stay only in one color family or compile a “capsule wardrobe” or keep my total item count under a certain number doesn’t work for me & truly saddens me. No doubt I’ll make future stupid purchases, but hopefully I’m armed with better weapons to ward off such errors.
God speed to those who pack up the whole fam-damily & backpack across the glaciers with nothing but a backpack, a Leatherman & a blogspot account. Same for those who have a full-size, walk-in closet, but elect to have only 7 hanging items, 2 pairs of shoes, 1 sweater & when needed, they’ll borrow a bathing suit, a winter coat & underwear.
For me, I like new stuff. I like to change stuff as I change me. Eight year old Jane is not the same as 23 yr. old Jane, who is not the same as 30 yr. old Jane, etc. What I wore in 1988 is not at all what I like or would want wear today. Safe to say that 10 years from now, I’ll likely have a different style & clothing needs than I do in 2015.
Hopefully from now on out that when I go clothes shopping, I’ll remember that I look stupid in stripes, hate itchy wool, look ghastly in red, can’t stand necklaces, etc. But, if something sparks joy & I know I’ll wear it – Ima gonna buy it! 33 items & minimalism in general – be damned!
Amen! And hurray to those of you who choose the minimalist path because it makes you happy. We are all different!
not wear grey??? impossible 🙂
another thing i’ve learned that i’m always going on about is that we ARE always evolving. i don’t know, if you’re not, then what else is there? i mean, who wants to be “done”?? i used to think i did. but through the wisdom of readers here and comments, i started to understand and realize how ridiculous that is. i wanted my wardrobe to evolve with me over the years, not be stuck trying to fit into IT. or make it something it isn’t.
I recently did a major closet purge and winnowed my closet down to 110 hangers. That still seems like a lot but I intentionally have dupes of certain items so that I will have options when things are in the laundry.
I have 19 skirts and about 8 of them are exactly the same black ponte pencil skirt, but at 3 slightly different lengths – I like a shorter hem when I wear flat shoes and a longer hem when I wear a heel. Do you have dupes like this? I could lower my number of hangers by eliminating the twins, but I guess this would only be for bragging rights, because 110 hangers fit in my closet comfortably.
It feels good to have a closet where I can see everything and know I really like and feel good in (almost) all of it. This has kept me from shopping for fall so far this year, and fall is my most tempting season
Interesting .. I wonder if they just miss the sizing (clerical error) or do it on purpose to push the clothing out the door .. lol. One may never know 😛
Monica.
I’ve learned a lot this year….about why I shop, what my “triggers” are, the items I tend to purchase on repeat…and, the biggest thing: To shop more mindfully of need and want. That doesn’t mean I finally get it right all the time ( “A striped shirt? What a novel idea!”)
At least I know I’m headed in the right direction for me. And it sounds like having a “Concious Closet” (echoes of Gwyneth) is right for you. This has been a terrifically helpful series for me and I hope you’ll find a way to continue it as it morphs and grows.
We LOVE shopping! That’s why we’re here. I have a postcard on my kitchen bulletin board that says,”I shop, therefore I am.” (My apologies to Descartes 😉 )
Moving really does force you to pare down. God knows, we’ve done it enough! And no, I never want to be a homeowner again. An Airstream? Maybe. 🙂
Love your blogs! Very thoughtful and quite interesting.
Here is a tip I have not yet seen in any blogs on ideas towards creating “purposeful minimalism”.
I removed almost all the closet doors in my house! (They were crap quality anyway). Excepting one closet to house the vacuum and winter coats and snow sports jackets I need here in Tahoe.
Yep, almost every closet is an official walk in and I can’t hide any s**t from visitors so eventually I got rid of lots of unnecessaries or aesthetically ugly stuff. Also an unexpected bonus is more square footage. My home is actually bigger now. To get great use out of those spaces I purchsed a few nice furniture pieces to fill those insets, which now house and display only those things I most love or are useful.
That was last year and this year I finally got my wardrobe into a full years worth of neutral, workable collection of around 55-60 pieces flexing only as something has to go, or a necessary purchase needed. I actually started that process about 9 months ago and my resolution this year was to get it done and cut the future spending for important things I will need in the future.
All that capsule wardrobe info out there was my guide and I did two separate shopping trips to fill holes. Now I am committing myself to wearing everything this year. The effortless coordination is finally spot on for the first time in my life! Hallelujah!!
So, now I love my home even more as it’s become a more styled and less cluttered space. And I have to admit I enjoy the excitement of shock when my friends realize the doors are gone. It’s been proclaimed a ballsy move on my part haha. Some people don’t even notice the change because furniture fills those nooks and they just assume it’s part of the square footage. That I really find funny, but keep it to myself. Now if I ever decide to sell I will purchase beautiful new mirror doors, but for me I love being more open concept, open-minded and open-spaced.
Rock on in whatever your vision of minimalism is and apply as necessary!
This is an amazing idea! We are considering down-sizing from 5-rooms&kitchen to 2-rooms&kitchen and this is something I will think about! Thanks for sharing.