Ace & Jig Milo overalls (large)
Girlfriend Collective half-zip sherpa in Ice (large)
Hello. How are you?
Aside from chasing around a 16-month old, I’ve been quite busy lately. Big news is I’m shutting down Slowre for at least a couple months, maybe longer? I haven’t decided yet, honestly it’s VERY hard to let go of completely – it was hard enough deciding to take a break – so I may start back after we move and get settled in again next spring/summer. I do not like to quit.
But I know it’s the right thing for me now. A week or so ago I was just sitting with Hawk while he played with blocks when all of a sudden he started stacking them instead of just knocking them over and I got so excited; I realized there was literally no where else I wanted to be or be doing at that moment than just being with him. And I CAN do that. I am lucky enough to be able to do that, so why would I not??
In spite of knowing this, as an entrepreneur/”business” woman, I am also being very very hard on myself. When I check in on social media (which isn’t very often lately) I see plenty of women, new moms, moms of kids Hawk’s age, moms of multiple young children, who are working, writing books, producing tons of content…and I let myself feel bad for being fulfilled just being Hawk’s mom.
I am though – content with just being Hawk’s mom right now – and I know that I personally just can’t manage Slowre AND be the kind of mom I want to be to Hawk. I WANT to prepare all his food for him. Most days during his 2.5/3 hour naps I am baking oatmeal for his breakfasts, making muffins for snacks, blending tofu yogurt, lentil pancakes for lunches, prepping veggies for dinners. Not to mention vacuuming, mopping, scrubbing spilled yogurt from his high chair…laundry…
Sure, I don’t have to do all that stuff, but I WANT to, and I am trying to get myself used to not apologizing for it, or feeling like a failure as an “independent woman”.
The truth is though, that I wasn’t being the kind of business owner I wanted to be either because I was always choosing Hawk, so instead of let Slowre continue to fall into obscurity and mediocrity I am choosing to take a break until I can devote as much energy to it as I need to for it to continue to grow and be successful.
So that’s the “business” news haha. I do also miss writing here and sharing thoughts on clothes and getting dressed. THAT is still important to me and feels more like “me” now than managing a consignment business.
Here are the things I bought during BF/CM sales this year:
Girlfriend Collective – pocket leggings + half-zip sherpa in Ice. I did get the Luxe legging a while ago when they were having another sale, and while I love how they feel and look in general, they’re getting little nicks here and there that turn into pulls; I can tell they won’t last long, or at least they won’t look very nice if they do, so I don’t really recommend those. None of my other Girlfriend leggings have ever showed nicks, but still my favorites are the basic high-rise compressive leggings. I love this half-zip sherpa; it’s my coat now since my Patagonia one doesn’t zip up…
Babaa – This wool cardigan, which is my second cardigan from Babaa. I love them both and still wear the cotton cardigan whenever it’s a bit warmer, but this wool one is nice and cozy; just what I need at home rn.
Covet & Lou – Ichi Antiquities cardigan
Organic flannel shirt from Everlane, which I basically wear everyday with leggings in the AM before I take my shower.
And for your Hawk update:
(he just woke up from his nap and I hadn’t put his hair up yet)
His grandfather (my dad) bought him his first Lacoste shirts for Hanukkah 🙂
They are SOOOOOO freaking cute
He’s just the most fun. When it’s sunny and not below freezing here we still spend a lot of time outside. He has some warm jackets and wool socks he wears with his Crocs and seems perfectly happy playing outside, even if I’m freezing LOL. We go for a walk everyday and otherwise just play and hang out at home. I try very hard to think of stimulating and educational things for him to do, but I mostly just let him do what he wants and play alone if he feels like it. He also really loves to watch livestreams of birds on YouTube and BBC oceanscapes on loop haha. He is obsessed fish and all things ocean.
Finally, I’m doing really well. A lot of my pain seems to be barely noticeable most of the time now which makes SUCH A HUGE difference in my days. There’s no such thing as “control” when you have a toddler I guess, but I do feel like I’m settling into as much of a routine as I can now, which includes time for me to exercise in the mornings and going to bed pretty early at night haha. I’m still a morning person, and I love to sit with my coffee alone in the AM for the few minutes I get, but nowadays I REALLY look forward to bedtime!!
How are you?? Did you get anything with BF/CM deals? What are you doing for the holidays this year? I hope you’re all well – I know it’s such a hard time for everyone now, but I can’t help feeling a little hopeful for things to be better next year.