Ilana Kohn Kimbo dress (medium) | seems to be sold out in this color
Birkenstock Arizona sandals | purchased secondhand
Black Crane Wide culottes (large)
Storq daily tank
Emerson Fry Fete jacket (xs/s – too small!) | year or so old
Only Hearts pajama pants | large
Entireworld recycled cotton tee | large
Ace & Jig Duster (Atlantis/Sail textile) | large
I’m not even sure what to say anymore. Obviously…I haven’t posted in a LONG time. Is anyone still out there? 😉
I hope you are all well. We are still doing fine. Hawk is eight months now and crawling all over the place. As you can see from my new office space (his room is where my office was), he has an enclosure there, as well as downstairs, so that he’ll stay put when I need him to, and stay away from the stairs. Otherwise, when I sit on the floor with him, all he wants to do is climb/crawl over me, back and forth. But if he sees one of Dagny’s treats/cookies laying around, he takes off like a bat out of hell towards it. He’s FAST.
He also moved into his own room a couple weeks ago. It happened a bit earlier than I had planned, but it was getting really disruptive for him in our room with nap times, etc., and I sort of wanted him to have his own space. The problem is it’s upstairs – we have a master on main, which I HATE now, loved before Hawk LOL – and I was a basketcase for a few nights; he felt so far away. He did well after one night though, and he LOVES to play in his room with his books now.
He’s also weaning himself from nursing, sort of. For a few days all he wanted to do was bite me, so I pulled him away. Now, we only nurse in the morning, and very rarely also at night if he seems to want it, or wakes up inconsolable. I’m conflicted about stopping nursing him though. I had thought I’d go ahead and wean him since he’s down to once a day anyway, but I still enjoy the time he does nurse, even if it’s only for a couple minutes on each side. The main reason I would wean him is to try and get my hormones/weight/pain levels back under control. I’m trying not to get my hopes up, but from what I’ve heard/read, and what my PT told me, about six months after weaning you can feel a lot better. I’m almost THAT desperate to feel better, but not quite.
I can’t tell if I have less pain overall, or if I’m just better at suffering through it LOL. I’ve started riding the Peloton again regularly, and I feel a lot better when I do, interestingly enough. My thighs still hurt a lot, my back sometimes, my wrist/thumb only when I pick Hawk up (haha), and NOW, I have plantar fasciitis. Face plant. What ELSE can happen? No, don’t answer that. A lot more can happen, and I’m grateful that my aches and pains are manageable.
So enough about that, let’s talk about clothes and shopping. As you can see, I’ve added several things to my wardrobe lately (I’ve purged a lot too). I’ve gained more weight recently; I’m about five/ten pounds heavier than I was when I was pregnant. It’s almost like my body is just trying to hold on to, or pile on all the weight/fat now, as a cushion? a barrier? I don’t know, but it’s disconcerting. Yes, I’m doing my fair share of baking, and Leo started making sourdough bread, but I’m not eating enough to gain that much weight. It’s another reason why I’m sort of keen to wean Hawk, just to see what happens to my body.
I’m also pretty sure now, that whatever happens, my body will never look/feel like it did before I was pregnant. I’m not complaining about that, but I don’t think my “new” body will work with the clothes I saved, and I’m also learning what styles seem to work best with my body as it is. All that is to say there’s a lot of trial and error going on in my closet; I’m adding and deleting a lot of items.
But IF I’m going to spend money now, I’m going to make a conscious effort to spend it where it can have an impact. I want the small designers I follow and buy from to stick around after the pandemic, and I believe (I know!) that every sale helps right now. So I’ve purchased directly from Ilana Kohn and Ace & Jig, and I bought my Black Crane pants from Covet & Lou.
I’m really enjoying the BC pants and duster from Ace & Jig (can you believe all the color??), but I haven’t worn the IK dress yet because it’s been cool, and I’ve been waiting to wash it. I definitely get dressed every day and right now, it’s really important to me to have something enjoyable to wear. Not just something that looks pretty, and that I love, but something that FITS my body and my life at the moment. These things all do.
I really hope you are all doing well. I miss you.
Enjoying his book in the sun 😉
So glad you are back! Seems like Hawk is getting so big & fun to read about his love of books. Stay safe & well!
Hi Grechen and Hawk! So good to see you again…
Your baby is too cute! Sorry to hear about all the postpartum struggles. I just had my baby 3 months ago and can relate to everything just feeling…different. I always enjoy your clothing posts and am curious about everyone’s quarantine style. My budget for new clothes is zilch right now so it’s fun to daydream about what I’ll buy someday soon. 🙂
We’ve missed you!!!
Hawk=adorable (with a French accent, bien sur)
I think we are ALL gaining weight just by staying in=less movement in general. I know I am.
Hawk continues to be adorable. And look at all your color!! I love that Ace & Jig duster! Clearly I don’t need clothing, as I’m working from home in a tee and leggings every day (NOT pajamas, at least – that’s my line!) But am craving a linen caftan 😉
I’ve been very spoiled in quarantine – I have a job I can do well from home, we live in the country on a lot of land so I can easily get outside (walk to the mailbox, walk to the pond to feed the fish….) Garden. And I’m an introvert. My biggest problem is everyone from work wanting to do video conferences all the time 😉
I hope your family stays well!
Wonderful to hear from you again! Hang in there and be gentle with yourself during these strange times. Hawk is absolutely adorable!
I love all your outfits and Hawk is so adorable! Thank you fir posting and checking in!
I think every child is beautiful, but that baby of yours? Exceptional!
I’m 64, and in my lifetime I’ve experienced the ebb and flow of changes in my body, and how I feel about it. When my husband was dying, I gained so much weight, and it’s taking awhile to find myself again, physically and emotionally. We’re so hard on ourselves and change comes in fits and starts. You’re such a beautiful woman; you’ll get to where you’re going.
Glad you are doing ok and that the pain is subsiding. Wear whatever makes you feel good is the best way to go right now, for many reasons.
I’ve been WFH and on most days I manage to force myself to get dressed, wash my face and wet down my epic bedhead. And to be honest – those are accomplishments! I am lucky to still have a job because it’s considered “life-sustaining” although my hours may be reduced soon, which I knew would be inevitable.
The weather is very much “chilly spring” here so lots of 40s, 50s and 60s up and down and all over the place. I mostly just wear jeans or heavy linen pants (depending on how cold it is that day) and a sweater.
it’s been sort of chilly spring here too, weirly. i don’t remember a colder april.
i think whatever we can manage every day is good enough. i have to take a shower and get dressed before noon or i just feel “off” and not motivated to accomplish anything. what i accomplish is debatable LOL – i keep Hawk alive and thriving, and that’s about all i can do most of the time.
sorry about your reduction in hours. this is such a hard time.
I can’t get over you in all of this color! But it looks great, so keep it up. I hear you about supporting the small companies – I’ve only purchased a few things since quarantine because we’ve now got 4 adults to feed since 2 of our daughters are home with us, but that’s for the short term. Such a weird time in our lives that I cant always wrap my head around it. Getting dressed seems like it takes way more effort than it should. Thanks for sharing a Hawk photo with us – I love that he’s into his books! So cute!
Thank you for saying hello and for sharing your very cute baby with us.
it’s so weird…i hardly ever wear black anymore. everything really has changed 😉
i bet it’s nice to have the girls home for a little while…i miss my step-son since he wasn’t able to come for his spring break, and probably won’t come over the summer. who knows? i just don’t know how to navigate this whole thing so i’m just not even thinking about leaving the house.
hi charlotte – thank you 🙂
i am exceptionally hard on myself, and always have been. i joke all the time here that i’d get a prize for it if it was a contest, which is not really funny. i’d like to be easier on myself, and i think having hawk helps, mostly because he makes me live in the moment, and i can’t worry about anything else. he’s really fun haha.
Love your posts, Hawk looks great!
You’ve inspired another purchase for me ? that lovely Ace & Jig duster is winging its way to Scotland ??????? ?