Hope news trouser
James Perse slub crewneck t-shirt
Caslon (Nordstrom) army jacket | sold out
Margot Wolf Necklace
Vince sneakers | they fit PERFECTLY a 1/2 size down
3.1 Phillip Lim Ryder satchel
Technically, this is almost-42 (my birthday isn’t until 11/2), but can I just say how much I love what 42 feels – and looks – like?? I can honestly say that I have never felt better in my life than I do right this second. Which I think, makes me look better, if I may say so. My body is healthier and stronger than I ever thought it could be; I’m amazed honestly. Just a few years ago, I would never have thought I could feel this way. So comfortable. I always wanted to feel GOOD in my skin, but I never thought I would. I never HAVE. EVER.
My whole life up until the last year or so I’ve been stuck in a body that didn’t feel like me, was uncomfortable, and always letting me down. Of course, it was me, who was letting my body down…
I can’t look back on my high school or college years fondly, wishing I still looked like that. I look better now, subtle wrinkles, under-eye circles, growing double, nay, triple chin, and all. I feel better now. I AM better now.
I love aging. The last few years have been better for me in terms of personal growth and health than any previous year. Something “clicked” when I turned 40 I think. I stopped giving a shit, for one thing. Oh, I still do sometimes, and I obviously still have struggles (which I’m very vocal about here), but overall, I’m focused much more on me, what’s important to me, how I truly feel, and what I can do to change things instead of turning my attention outward, as I was doing for years.
(via Instagram)
I am powerful beyond measure. I’ve been able to transform my body, quit caffeine, and become more positive overall. All things I thought I’d NEVER be able to do just a couple years ago. I was sure I was a lost cause. All until something changed. I think it was Pure Barre. I found my workout, and I fell in love with my body again. After that, everything fell into place, and change was easy. Relatively. I will never underestimate the power of just “doing” it again.*
But enough on that. Did you see my hair? Next time I think of growing it out, stop me, please. I have hated my hair for months, but couldn’t afford to get it cut where I wanted to, and also sort of convinced myself I should try and grow it out. But my hair had reached that point where it was just below my shoulders and did that annoying flip-up thing. Nothing I did would stop it, and I HATED it. So I wore it up in a ponytail most of the time.
After selling my Rag & Bone boots and a few other things, I could afford to get my hair cut and colored, so I made appointments and went in yesterday, still struggling with deciding whether or not to cut it short, or just trim it. But my stylist is AMAZING, and listened to me, all the while playing with my hair until she pulled it over to one side, while holding it up off my neck and I was like “WOW, okay…” And here we have it.
I’ve always liked my hair shorter, and I think it suits me. But I was scared to be perceived as one of “those” older women who cut their hair once they turn 40 and basically just give up on life. Not that I think that’s an accurate portrayal AT ALL, but in the back of my mind, I wanted to have long, beautiful hair – because I really love the way it looks on other women, and it’s been a while since I had long hair. AND I thought I should try it.
But if I’ve learned anything from my struggle with ankle boots, chambray shirts, and denim jackets, it’s that I need to stick with what works for ME, and not try to emulate other women; I can appreciate and honor them for who they are, not because I want to look like them.
So, I can safely say that I truly love my hair now. I need to get my color done, and I’ll be going darker for fall, but I want to stick with this hairstyle for a while. At least until my next birthday…If I can quit coffee, I can stick with a haircut!!
And again, thank you all for being here, reading, and engaging with me. This has been the most amazing journey of my life, and I’m honored to have shared it with you.
Happy Friday 🙂
*I hope this doesn’t sound like bragging, I don’t mean it to; I’m really just truly astonished at what I’ve been able to accomplish. I mean, really surprised, so much that I can’t stop thinking about it. It’s scary, really, how powerful we are when we decide to do something with all our being. I say this because I know that if I can do it, you can too. It takes time, and a lot of effort, but man…when you see what you can become, it’s all worth it.
Not remotely like bragging. Only like inspiration, and like happiness from someone who is never anything but open and helpful here on the Internet. Happiest of birthdays to you, Grechen. All the best from California.
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Happy early birthday! I I’ve thoroughly enjoyed reading your Minimal Closet series. I’m a minimalist to the core and have already implemented a lot of what you talk about in my lifestyle. I can so relate to a lot of what you’re saying. I’m not 40 yet (getting close) but I remember when I turned 30 I felt very similar – I just had this strong feeling of finally letting go of trying to fit in, etc. It’s so freeing. Congrats on all you’ve accomplished! 🙂 P.S. Did you by chance get this Caslon jacket a couple months ago? It looks a lot like the one I got on sale at Nordstrom’s. Love it!
thank you ina!!
i got the jacket in march, or may, right before we went to san francisco, so it probably was on sale recently…it’s great, if a teeny bit big on me. but that makes it better for layering 🙂
thanks lisa 🙂
You look amazing for almost-42 or ANY age! The haircut & color look really good (though I liked it longer too 😉
My hair does the flip thing too – if I keep it at chin length I’m ok but at the neck/shoulder it really bugs me. I’ve just let it grow longer than shoulder and for some reason I’ve passed the hurdle – it still flips but now it has a different feel so it doesn’t bother me 😉 I probably look more “professional” when it’s at chin length, but I can’t pull it up when I travel, which can be a necessity some years….
Hope you have some fun plans for your birthday! Pure Barre, walk in the park with your loves, something that you’ll enjoy!
Not bragging at all, Grechen. You are an inspiration, I adored this post. Happy early birthday!
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Is it waxed cotton with some stretch? I had to size down. It was sold out pretty fast as it’s such an effortless, classic piece.
oh, no it’s not waxed, just cotton…i should have sized down, but it’ll be good for wearing over sweaters, etc.,
Also, I just ordered Vince Bowen at Nordstrom Rack online. Prob can’t afford to keep them but love the style. So hard to find affordable, quality slip-on sneakers!
omg!! nice price. and color!!! you will love them (assuming the size fits you…!!)
i always size down 1/2 size in vince shoes but i was concerned with my newest pair because my feet were bloated from it still being hot here, and from wearing sandals all summer…but now that it’s cooled down a bit, they fit perfectly. they’ve also stretched a bit.
No, you are not bragging, I like to read your reflections. The new haircut suits you so well, you look amazing.
Happy Birthday Grechen!
I also have “long hair envy” and once my hair gets around my neck, I start looking at pixie cuts .. lol. But the slight reverse A line that I have is as long as I can go 🙂
I think 40’s is a great age .. you realize that all the small stuff isn’t important and that you can take control of your life.
Monica.
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So funny–I agree with what you wrote 100%, and I am 54. I just hacked off my superfine, thin, just-wavy-enough-to-look-unkempt hair–to deal with several salon color disasters (just supposed to lift out the yellowing from the gray–ended up unevenly bleaching the remaining dark hair, then lowlights to fix and and and)—after trying to grow it into a lob–for just the reason you say–not wanting to look like I have given up—and it looks sooooo much better super short, suits my style, my life, and everything. My husband always reminds me when I point out the so-and-so has, say, frumpy gray hair, that *I* would not, and do not.
My adventures in bad hair coloring were cheap at $700+ all in, because I think I will forego anything more permanent in terms of “rejuvenation.” I imagine bad Botox, fillers or heaven forfend, surgery. Sunscreen and good skin care are my “youth” strategy! That and a positive attitude!
i was afraid i’d miss pulling it back, but i never really liked the way it looked when i pulled it back. or when it was down…so i don’t know what i was thinking!
i’m definitely doing pure barre on my birthday, and really want to go see gone girl at the fancy movie theater (iPic) 🙂 but we’ll see. no specific plans yet, i just want to enjoy the day…
thanks so much alison 🙂
thank you so much!
oh, i was so tempted to just cut it ALL off again…but i’ve done that twice already, and i think that’s enough. i liked it, but not enough to want to deal with the maintenance again!
and yes on taking control of my life – that’s sort of how i feel. like NOW i’m in charge!
Hi Grechen ! Happy Birthday! You look amazing for any age. I think your happiness and comfort in your skin are shining through. Its not bragging at all. Its rather inspirational. Enjoy your special day. Your hair look awesome btw!
The hair is absolutely adorable!! Happy early birthday, Grechen!
It doesn’t sound like bragging, it sounds like happiness & that’s something to be proud of!
I didn’t hear any bragging, but go for it, brag away. All women who feel great about themselves should probably brag a little since it’s a hard feeling to achieve for almost everyone. Happy early birthday!
Happy Birthday! You deserve to feel pride in you appearance and accomplishments. BTW: Your comment still didn’t appear on my Disqus post. If you could please leave one again, I’d appreciate it. Thanks!
Happy, happy birthday! I love your hair short. I too am a short hair person. I’ve had it long at various times throughout the years, but I personally think I’m more “me” with short hair. I love that you are comfortable in your own skin. That is something that I’m still trying to achieve. I’m so happy to know that it’s not a lost cause. Thank you for giving me hope. 🙂
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Happy 42nd birthday! I remember mine fondly! Love love your hair, very flattering, very you. And amen…ditto…completely loving all your thoughts.
Happy birthday! Have a wonderful day and a year full of new adventures.
Not only are you 42 and fab…..you are for one year only, the answer to everything and life itself…..just ask the hitchhikers guide to the galaxy.
Good Morning & Happy Birthday
found your blog last night and read for hours, thank you.
I need to quit diet coke, did you post about your caffeine experience?
Hope you are having a lovely birthday.
E
Happy Birthday, Grechen! You look wonderful and you deserve to celebrate!
thank you!! i haven’t posted an update in a while…this week!!
haha! i haven’t read that yet…
Happy birthday Gretchen! Sorry I’m latte, but still sending my best wishes to you!
I hear what you’re saying, Kathryn! I’m 54, also, and grew out my short, side-parted bob into a shoulder length wavy lob for the same reason you did. I want to feel and look sexy, not be in
the “invisible” decade that I feel I’ve reached. But with health issues and surgery, I’ve been dealing with hair loss…what feels like lots! It’s probably not, but I’m a worrier. So, along with the weight gain, recovery, and hair loss, has come a sad dislike for how I look. Not just to others, but to myself.
I hear what you’re saying, Grechen, “just do it!” But I think I have some internal work to do before I get there.
You look absolutely great: great skin, great hair, great smile, and truly, a glow! 42 looks good on you! Keep growing and being such an inspiration to others. You’ve really found a purpose. 🙂
I hear what you’re saying, Kathryn! I’m 54, also, and grew out my short, side-parted bob into a shoulder length wavy lob for the same reason you did. I want to feel and look sexy, not be in
the “invisible” decade that I feel I’ve reached. But with health issues and surgery, I’ve been dealing with hair loss…what feels like lots! It’s probably not, but I’m a worrier. So, along with the weight gain, recovery, and hair loss, has come a sad dislike for how I look. Not just to others, but to myself.
I hear what you’re saying, Grechen, “just do it!” But I think I have some internal work to do before I get there.
Grechen, you look absolutely great: great skin, great hair, great smile, and truly, a glow! 42 looks good on you! Keep growing and being such an inspiration to others. You’ve really found a purpose. 🙂