James Perse recycled crepe flared dress | sold out
Birkenstock Arizona sandals
Jerome Dreyfuss Florent backpack | review here
Since I’ve been working towards cleaning out and minimizing my wardrobe, I’ve started reading a lot more blogs and message boards. Besides noting that a lot of us talk about and struggle with the same issues, I also see that there’s a WHOLE lot of serious-ness around fashion and dressing oneself out there on the blogosphere. Sometimes I feel like a lot of bloggers and/or commenters focus too much on “perfection,” uniforms, and dressing for one’s body type, even creating issues where there really aren’t any, while neglecting our innate desire (well, mine anyway) to experiment with fashion.
I have been guilty of focusing too much on perfection and “rules” for the types of clothing I should own (no stripes, haha!) at some point or another, I know, but I’ve made the decision to put all of that behind me. There’s no such thing as perfect, and even though I’m committed to having a smaller wardrobe, I’m not playing by any hard and fast rules, and although, yes, I do consider myself a shopaholic, I also don’t WANT to avoid shopping or buying new things for my closet, I just want to do it more thoughtfully.
Overall, my biggest “issue” is my all-or-nothing attitude. Too often, I overwhelm myself by planning out how I’m going to do something, so it will be “perfect,” and then have an anxiety attack at the last minute because it’s not. Of course it’s not! Then, I go to the opposite extreme and give up (I have done this with diets, and shopping “bans”).
I’ve found with a lot of “minimal” wardrobe blogs that there is an all-or-nothing attitude about shopping and clothing that I just can’t get behind. I need to overcome my need for perfection and understand that THERE IS NO SUCH THING as the perfect wardrobe; I’m not going to do exercises to determine how to create it, and then get down to an ideal number of items.
If you’re not like me, then I’m sure these exercises will be wonderful for you – a good learning tool – but if you are like me: over-analytical, anxious, and easily overwhelmed by trying to do “the right/perfect thing” all the time, then I would say to take it slow, and find your own way through to a smaller closet and a wardrobe you love.
I have NEVER made “fun” a priority in my life – in fact, a lot of the time, I try and avoid it. But I think now that I’m almost 42, it’s time for some fun. And honestly, the way I do it most often now, is with my clothing choices. (baby steps!!) I wear traditionally “unflattering” silhouettes because I like them, I feel good in them, and find them “fun.” I buy two-tone Birkenstocks because they’re fun (haha! true, though!), and wear harem pants and shapeless dresses because they make me feel free.
So what if nobody likes them? so what if I look 25 pounds heavier? or shorter, or my legs look stumpy when I wear flats? I’ve never tried to position myself as an expert at dressing for my body type, or even at dressing at all! I wear what I wear, post it here, and if you love it, great, if you don’t, also great. If I inspire you to try something new and different, then even better. But I’m not trying to tell anyone what they should wear, or how they should wear it because goodness knows I barely know how to dress myself!
There’s so much information and knowledge out there; it can be a lot to take in. It’s all helpful and valuable too, but only if you don’t take it TOO SERIOUSLY. Adapt it and make it your own. Figure out how to work advice you read into your life so that you can create lasting change (it took me a long time to learn to do this…). And most of all, remember to have fun.
Happy Friday!! How do you have fun with your clothes?
Linked up with Patti’s Visible Monday – please check out the other participants!
YES! The word perfect implies that there is a right way to do things, and we know that’s not true! I’m heavily swayed by my emotions and who I want to be that day. Some days I want comfort and other days I want to wow myself. I’m personally having a hard time with finding my staple pieces because of this. I would say my best way to play with fashion is through accessories. I love statement jewelry and wild accessories. I like to think of my clothes as a canvas for my accessories. 🙂
Lindsay´s last blog post ..Getting Rid of Sentimental Items
i am EXACTLY THE SAME – an emotional dresser for sure. which is also why it’s hard for me to pack for traveling; how do i know what i’ll “feel” like wearing on a given day? some days i want fitted, some days i want oversized…
i keep thinking i should not be so emotional about my outfits/clothing, but then, what fun would that be??
This is a great post. It is also a great outfit, and for what it’s worth, it is great on you. I love the Arizonas – I have janky feet and can’t wear a slide-type sandal, ever, so I admire from afar.
I really like the message about fun. I’m pregnant and have just been lurking on the few fashion blogs I read, like yours, for a little while, and unlike you, so many bloggers really are self-serious about ‘figure flattery’ and stuff like that. Where is the space for fun? And I am writing out of ignorance but even just the idea of having to do formal exercises for the number of items to own or whatever is so exhausting sounding, and like you’d always be on a merry-go-round of closet analysis. No thanks!
One of the resolutions I made this year was to stop counting my clothing pieces. If I have 10 sweaters that I love, and I find another that I also love and I buy it, there’s no need to get rid of anything just to keep the number at 10!
My only rule is that I get rid of things when I’m no longer enjoying wearing them. So I get rid of the clutter but I don’t limit myself. (My budget limits my purchases, and I have expensive taste; so I’m not over-buying anyway.)
I’m old enough to know that there is no such thing as timeless fashion. Styles (even classic styles) change, and so do my tastes. I’ll always have a few favorite designers, but I also know that I’ll want to change things out every few years.
Great advice Grechen:) If fashion isn’t fun, then what is the point. Rules are for breaking and we just need to work out what works for us. For some figure flattery is paramount, for others ‘just flattering enough’ is the desired effect. I dress for myself and if I am happy with what I see then Im happy. What is beautiful and what is attractive, even what is stylish is in the eye of the beholder. And I so relate to your love of unconventional silhouettes. I feel like me and I feel free.
Forgot to say I love your shapeless dress and I have just bought my first pair of birks!! Yes, Im having fun.
Deborah´s last blog post ..Just Browsing…
Love what you said here Grechen. Yes, why not wear “unflattering’ silhouettes if we want? Clothes should be fun not just another area of endless striving for perfection.
Your hair looks awesome!!!! Love this dress on you…it’s one of your best looks.
I want to have fun with my clothes, but not have to struggle each day to sort through such a HUGE mass of items to get to what I’m looking for. My “runaway capitalism” has gone rampant!!! My wardrobe is controlling me right now, and that’s messed-up. So, my plan is to get to it, now that I’ve found a consignment store, and sell, sell, sell!
I think that once I’ve done that, and have a workable wardrobe…one which I can recall which pieces I actually own, I’ll be successful and have more fun with my clothes.
I have fun now by searching ideas on Pinterest, which has given me a great visual idea of my style. And I love to accessorize, which is why my only prints are stripes (sorry, Grechen, but they’re ALL different! 😉 )
Now, excuse me…I’ve got a couple of closets to clean.
Gretchen, I just discovered your blog while researching fit for Everlane silk shirts and I just have to say thank you for blogging and posting your thoughts, advice and photos. I love your style and I definetly think you look fabulous????.
P.s. Because of your Everlane posts I ordered my first Everlane silk round collar shirt last week and I love, love it! Thanks!
Those aren’t supposed to be question marks above. It’s a smiley:)
thanks cc 🙂
i agree, although I do sometimes find the idea of doing “worksheets” appealing, they never work out. i tend to think that i’ll do it, and then all my problems will be solved, voila! easy, peasy. and that’s absolutely not the way it works. it can be tempting to think so though, that you can just do the exercises in a workbook and you’ll figure everything out. that probably works very well for a lot of people, but not for me!!
everything you’ve said is SO TRUE!! thanks for the reminders 🙂
i am constrained by my budget, which is what works best for me now, i think, not by a specific number of items. I think now that i’ve gotten my wardrobe back to manageable, I’ll know when i’ve got too much and need to start getting rid of things, but for now, i can let that happen naturally.
and good point about timeless fashion – it’s like THE PERFECT whatever – it DOESN’T EXIST. even classic styles like a black blazer change periodically: some seasons are oversized, some slim, some with leather details; i like to look “modern” with my style also, which does require changing some things out every once in a while…
yay! can’t wait to see an outfit with them 🙂
thanks jaime – and what is “flattering” and “unflattering” anyway? yes, there are “conventional” ideas of flattering, but they usually involve trying to look as thin and as tall as possible. i’d rather look like me, thank you…
welcome marzabeth! so glad you’re here 🙂
i love all my everlane pieces – i always look forward to the new pieces, hopefully soon!!
hope you enjoy your silk blouse.
yes, i know that stripes are all different 🙂 if i can have 26 white t-shirts THAT ARE ALL DIFFERENT, then who am i to talk??
hope you made some progress on your closets this weekend!! i do think you have the right idea though, although it’s taken me so long to get on board with it… having fewer, more valuable (not in terms of money, but in terms of how much they mean to you) pieces will create THE ULTIMATE workable wardrobe!
Hi there
I agree! Fashion should be a fun thing. It doesn’t have to be tremendously serious unless of course you are in the industray and it is your job. But dressing as a blogger, I agree there doesnt have to be so many rules I like the black dress on you and there are many ways to utilize this in your closet!
from the link up,
please stop by, jess
http://www.elegantlydressedandstylish.com
I wish (or maybe it’s better that I don’t) that I lived closer to your consignment store Val!
I really like your attitude: fashion is never life-and-death, is it? I like your outfit too, very simple-chic. Thanks for sharing with Visible Monday.
Haha, Jen! Look at it this way: You’re probably a lot smaller than me. It would never work out, in the end! 😉