Eileen Fisher slouchy pants | size large petite
James Perse casual tee | size 2
Robert Clergerie Frazzia sandals | on sale at La Garconne, I’m a size 8 and wearing a 38.5 (they might be a teeny bit smallish)
If you recall my post Friday, I mentioned that I tried on and bought these Eileen Fisher slouchy pants after deciding, with some urgency, that I needed a pair of slouchy, light, black pants. I originally bought them in a size small, regular, but went back on Friday after trying the size smalls on at home with everything I own, deciding that I wanted them to be more slouchy, and shorter. And I ended up with the large petite.
I wore them all weekend rolled up with my Birkenstock Arizona sandals, and then unrolled as you see here. Honestly, I liked them more in person rolled up, and with certain shoes, showing more of my ankle works better with these pants, but when I looked at the pictures I took, I liked the way the pants look unrolled/longer. That doesn’t mean I won’t wear them rolled if I feel like it, but in this case, having photos to look at does help to “clarify” my look a bit more, and I’ll freely admit that they are more flattering longer (and with heels, or at least a platform as you see here).
The large are quite slouchy on me, and sit pretty low on my waist (they’re too big, generally), but even though EF says they won’t shrink, I wanted to allow some room for that since I have found that even in cold water, viscose and rayon shrink a little. And anyway, I DID want them to be slouchy. I’m really pleased with them; they’re incredibly comfortable, and I think will be excellent for traveling, and wearing in all sorts of situations. I don’t even mind wearing them now, in 100+ degree heat, if I’m wearing something light and sleeveless on top, and sandals.
I bet now you’re wondering how my “minimal closet” journey is going, with all this shopping I’ve been doing lately! Excellent question. And I’ve been trying to figure that out myself. What am I doing? Why did I all of the sudden decide I needed those pants? And then why did I literally obsess over NOTHING BUT those pants for 24 hours after I got the first pair until I settled on the final pair? Why the hurry?
Ultimately, the answer is that I’m stuck on an even bigger thing I’m trying to figure out, this HUGE idea I have to compliment my Conscious Closet Consulting business. I’ve been thinking about the HUGE idea for a couple of months, trying to figure out how to implement it and then market it. And then of course, I hit that wall known as analysis paralysis. I’m stuck. So instead of working it out, and moving on, I shifted my focus to something much easier to deal with, and solve; my wardrobe.
This is easy. This is what I know. I don’t know how to figure out what I want to do next. That is the unknown I’m so deathly afraid of. Although I’ve been deep into the unknown before. I got divorced and started a new business, leaving behind a stable, full-time job, AT THE SAME TIME. But I don’t remember it feeling THIS hard, I wasn’t this scared. Which of course, is the thing about memories, they’re never as you remember them. But, I thought that was supposed to make it easier to do the scary thing the next time then, because you survived the first time, what can possibly happen WORSE the second time?
And now, I’m 10 years older. And wiser, I daresay. Does that make me more sensitive to the possibility of failure and rejection? Perhaps it’s because I want this to work out SO BADLY I can taste it. I feel it in my bones. I have to do it. And that scares the crap out of me.
So, I revert back to what I know: shopping, and searching for exactly the right thing. This is what I’m good at.
Which is funny, because this is exactly what I want to do for more people, in person, and in a more organized way. I love doing it this way, on my blog, and sharing with you what I find, my experiences with brands/products, but I want to do it both on a larger scale, and on a more personal one. Which is what I’m struggling to figure out HOW to do. And then, I’m caught up in how to market myself in person; the scary thing, as it were.
And here we are again. Back at the beginning. I have tried to run away from the fear. I have tried to banish the fear with a pair of amazing black slouchy pants. And I have tried to suffocate the fear with waves of stair-climbing sessions at the gym, and back-to-back shopping trips. Yet all that I have left is fear. It’s still here. So my only option is to face it head-on. Look it in the eyes and tell it to go to hell.
Happy Monday !!!
Just here to cheer you along. Go you!
Lisa´s last blog post ..“Finternships” Could Make Use Of So Much Knowledge Capital, Or, Saturday Morning at 9:03am
You are one of my favorite bloggers—–and a key reason is your honesty! I, too, have comfortable ways to divert me from my fears [finding great black pants is very familiar!]. So, all I can say is: you can do it, whatever “it” turns out to be……
Go You! I know the diversion of black slouchy pants all too well, but you figured out what that was really about and now you have a great pair of pants. You’ll be comfortable and look great when you do go for It.
I agree with all the previous comments– acknowledging what is going on is the first step and in the meantime, you ended up with a pair of pants that look terrific on you and you will definitely wear! Best of luck and thanks for sharing the journey with us. Beth
Get it girl! I’m more than convinced that anything you put your mind into & efforts behind will come to fruition! Excited for you!
Ah, Grechen, you really are my soul twin. I’ve been doing the exact same thing with the Nordstrom’s sale, distracting myself from knotty work problems with the pursuit of more stuff (although the stuff has been good, lol!)
I have no doubt you’ll figure out the solution and meanwhile thank goodness you’re here writing about it all! You’re one of my favorite bloggers as well, for just this reason.
I need those slouchy black pants 🙂 Ok, need to run to Nordstroms tomorrow 🙂
Monica.
MonicaP´s last blog post ..My new denim jean shorts for .91 cents
I love this outfit!!! ????
Humm, those ??? were a smiley face with love heart eyes. Did I mention I love that outfit!!
I am so tempted by those shoes!
they’re wonderful laurie! although i might have taken a half size up (39) in these. they’re not uncomfortable, but i’d like a bit more room…
ha!! i got it. sometimes emoticons don’t translate so well on wordpress 🙂
thank you!!
I just looked again and they don’t have my size. Decision made (for now…).
thank you 🙂
thank you beverly!!
check totokaelo and thedreslyn also…not to enable. i don’t think they are on sale/have many sizes at those places though. they come back every year, and there is a new “fall” version out now, that will go on sale in a couple months too. oh, and check 6pm.com frequently.
I relate very deeply to the pattern of returning to evaluating one’s wardrobe during times of uncertainty. Spending hours and hours and hours thinking about it. I feel like all I do sometimes is read about clothes. I am pregnant now, and having recovered several years ago from ED, I sometimes feel like all the progress I’ve made has been/is in the process of being lost right now, as I struggle with my self image even as my body is making this amazing baby. I try not to be selfish, (which I guess I equate to obsessing over my body) but it’s so incredibly hard. My coping mechanism is evaluating, criticizing and “perfecting” (ha!) my wardrobe. I’ve even returned to posting outfits (something I haven’t done since 2010) online at my blog. I wonder if this a good thing. I guess it is, because it helps me feel less obsessive about my imperfections, because when I see the pictures I usually think I look okay. Different, but okay. But I also don’t want to get caught up in “fashion” culture, always having to have new things, etc. Right now I have 206 things in my wardrobe. It’s a number I’ve struggled with, and I’m still in the process of trading things out, experimenting, etc. And I’m scared too — that I won’t be able to fit in any of my clothes after the pregnancy. The clothes I’ve spent SO MUCH TIME sourcing secondhand (that’s my commitment to avoiding “fast fashion”), the clothes that I think are “perfect” (ha!), that make me feel good about myself.
I guess I’m just trying to say I relate. It’s a struggle. But we do go on, don’t we? I seems like we have to!
Julia´s last blog post ..Back in 100+ Texas temps! I suppose in terms of temperature…
i’m glad you’re posting outfits 🙂 i love them. and btw, i think your striped skirt is bailey44 (i’m 99.999% sure) and it’s made in the US!! bonus. i had a dress version of that, very flattering. are your sol sana sandals comfortable? i’d been looking at those.
first. you’re going through way too many changes right now, physically and emotionally, to even TRY to deal with paring down/getting comfortable with your wardrobe. and things will change – obviously – soon, and then you’ll want to do it again.
second, i was thinking about this today a little more – using clothing and perfecting our wardrobes as a coping mechanism, and have come to the conclusion that it’s OKAY. everyone has a coping mechanism. some people play video games for hours, some watch tv, some run, some eat, whatever. all of those things are diversions, and ways to distract ourselves from hard work that needs to be done. the problem arises when a. you don’t realize, or want to admit why you’re doing what you’re doing/and/or it becomes obsessive and b. you can’t AFFORD to do what you’re doing.
my issues have bordered on both a. and b. in the past and now, i think i’ve got both of them under control – but am still bordering on the “can’t afford” part, sadly. and the obsessive part. UGH. but it’s not out of control. as soon as i realize i’m being obsessive, i think i have been pretty good about reigning it in.
there is nothing wrong with wanting to feel good about ourselves, and our way of doing it is though our clothing. there are worst ways than that, for sure. WAY worse ways.
enjoy your body, and the changes it’s going through. i know you’ve been through a lot to get there 🙂
Thank you so much for this, Gretchen! I think this is very good advice, and you’re right–I try so hard to both hold myself accountable and cut myself some slack. It can be such a struggle though. I think for the most part my pregnancy has actually been very easy, but the hardest part has been watching my body change — probably this isn’t surprising for anyone with a history of ED. But I do think I’ve done okay so far, when I’m being objective. If I spend a little more time thinking about my clothes…well, you’re right–there are WAY worse things I could be doing.
BTW, I love reading your blog so, I look forward to it every day. Thanks for IDing that striped skirt! I think you’re right, it does look like the Bailey 44 stuff — it’s such a great skirt, it looks amazing with everything and is one of the only skirts I find actually comfortable right now.
The Sol Sanas are pretty comfortable! They were weirdly itchy when I first got them (when my feet would sweat), but I think any shoe that’s not lined in real leather makes me itch in this heat. But it seems to have gone away for the most part. They haven’t given me any blisters and I think they look quite nice with a lot of different outfits, and people seem to compliment them a lot! I guess, though, the quality isn’t the very best for the original price, but I did get them on sale so I’m not too disappointed.
Thank you for the words of encouragement, and for looking at my blog, it means a lot to me!
Julia´s last blog post ..Back in 100+ Texas temps! I suppose in terms of temperature…
Glad to hear they run a little small… I futzed around, fretting, and by the time I went to pull the trigger on these, the 39s were sold out on avenue32.com, so I ordered the 40s. (I think they were cheapest there.) I’m a US 9, 39 in Birks, but 39 or 40 in most European shoes. So hopefully these run like Lanvin and Louboutin and the 40 will work…. I just LOVE your outfit in this post and want to recreate it. Our style is freakishly similar, although you’re a little more daring than me. 😉
oh, michele from beautymama.net got hers from avenue32.com also. AMAZING price. and i may have just bought this pair at amazon, because um, the price…and i’m hoarding robert clergerie at the moment – although they were $135 when i bought them. also got the nalo from totokaelo (SOOOOOOO GOOD BTW. but these run true or a little big) a couple weeks ago – and i’m sort of dying for this tessa pair…but whoa. i need to stop 😉
See? This is exactly why you’d succeed at a consulting business. You know where to find the good stuff, and you recognize it when you see it!
Fear in this case is a sign that you should go for it. And just think of the reward!
XOX Val
thank you val 🙂
Ha! Whoa Nellie indeed! Deep breaths…. 😉
I was checking out your blog and saw that post about the skirt: I concur with Grechen! (I sent you a message before I saw Grechen’s comment!). 😉
Well, I *finally* got my EF slouchy pants that I’ve been ogling ever since this July post (it’s Nov now). I was waiting for them to go on sale, which they finally did on the Bloomingdale’s site (thank you for the help, Grechen).
I really like them, but they don’t at all look like they do on me as they do on you – which is not surprising, since I’m 6′ tall 🙂
I got the Medium and they are VERY SHORT. And not at all slouchy. Alas, they do not come in a long, or I would have ordered those. In the past I’ve ordered larges, but EF larges are always too big on me – so medium it was. They’ll look great with sandals but I’m not sure about winterizing the look. I haven’t bought into the short bootie trend but if I had a pair of those it might work. All in all they seem more like well-made cropped leggings with pockets on me. So that’s good, as long as I adjust my expectations that they will not be for me what they are for you.