Via Instagram, not sure of the original source
I have been struggling trying to figure out what to say here, or anywhere, about the murder of George Floyd, and continued excessive use of force by police during the protests that have followed. I do not believe that silence automatically equals complicity or agreement, but I understand the argument. I have been silent because I know that whatever I have to say is irrelevant; it’s time for me to listen, not to speak.
I know that many people will disagree with that, and say that I should have spoken up, but I didn’t think it was the right thing to do. I found myself scrolling through instagram wishing that all the fellow white ladies I follow would stfu for a second and let other people speak (I follow way too many white ladies, I acknowledge that) for a while, so I didn’t want to do the same.
There is a fine line though, between making this about “us” (centering our words, taking over the conversation, and crying big tears) and that fact that it actually IS ABOUT US insofar that the systems in place in almost all our institutions in the U.S. have racist roots, policing especially. We are the ones these systems were designed to benefit and ultimately protect and serve, not the Black community, so we are the ones who should bear the brunt of the work of dismantling them. Yes, I said dismantling. Defunding, disbanding, destroying. All of the above.
I don’t know how best I can support that, but I’m trying to learn and do the work of figuring it out. Not being racist isn’t good enough anymore. (It never was, I acknowledge that, but I didn’t really understand that fully until now, and I definitely didn’t know what to do otherwise.)
I donated as much money as I could to Black Lives Matter and hope to continue to do so, along with other organizations. That’s not good enough either.
Honestly right now nothing is good enough. Nothing will bring back George Floyd, Breonna Taylor, Trayvon Martin, Ahmaud Arbery, Tamir Rice and all the other Black men and women murdered by police or white supremacists. But I have to believe that I can take steps in the right direction, no matter how small. Every book I read, everything I learn about how to raise an anti-racist child – to be better than I am – has to mean something.
I also know that I can learn more about and feature more Black designers, bloggers and activists here. I’m not sure my voice has much impact anymore; I have been sidetracked by a small human and nothing is as it was, but isn’t that the case now, with everything? There is truly nothing left but opportunity.
2020 can be a year for change if we fight hard enough for it. I’m going to try.
Black Lives Matter.
Black Lives Matter.
Black Lives Matter.
Black Lives Matter.
Black Lives Matter.
Black Lives Matter.
Grechen, thank you for this. Even as a brown woman, I too, have struggled with what to say. There is so much to process, and like so many voices have shared already, this is all going to be long-term, uncomfortable work. Your words really resonated with me, and I just also want to appreciate that you have a willingness to learn, listen, spotlight designers of color, and more. So thank you. And thanks for sharing.
There’s really nothing for me to add, other than saying “Thank you, “ for being honest about the work we white people have to do. The ball is in our court to make things right.
Just imagine this is a very long row of hearts. xoxox.
thank you so much genevieve.
i hope you and your family are doing well.
yes. i just don’t know why i haven’t done this work sooner. well, that’s not true, i do know; it’s because i have benefitted from the systems in place, and i also thought it “wasn’t about me” and i didn’t know what to do. which honestly makes me sick to say. i have felt so much anger at myself these last weeks for my choosing to ignore so much injustice. i’m so sorry for that…
thank you lisa, as always.
i hope you are well!
Hi Grechen,
Kudos to you!
As a minority myself, I have found very hard to put words to these things. I have had very hard conversations with my Caucasian family members, and I truly hope everyone could sit down for a minute to listen and learn. I didn’t think I would possibly be a victim of racism until this pandemic. It definitely made me realize how racism could happen to everyone and how desperate we all need to educate ourselves. I am not saying that only white people have a lesson to learn, I think we all do. I constantly remind myself that everyone is equal, no matter of their race, gender, sexual orientation or religion.
Thank you so much for speaking up. Wish you and your family the best.
thank you meg! i hope you and your family are well.
oh, i want more than anything for people to just sit down with each other and listen. that’s when everything started to shift for me, when I started listening and understanding that i couldn’t continue to see things through the lens of my own life and experiences.
I couldn’t agree more with not being hasty to speak up just because the herd was headed that direction. I needed time to process and do some deep soul searching. It felt more respectful of me to listen and resist the urge to throw myself into a narrative that I feel like so many white people co-opted. The onslaught of posts by influencers/blogger and retailers read the same…as if they all took the same PR script. We have hundreds of years of history (more, obviously, if we name colonialism for what it is) that will not be dismantled overnight. I think because the web of racism is so complex that my best course of action is to pick a lane and focus on meaningful change by learning and doing what I am able…not biting off more than I can chew, so to speak. I’m not judging others course of action, only saying we need to allow for individuals to decide how to navigate the long road ahead.
Thank you for always speaking in your authentic voice.
I could not agree more, and am doing the same. Thank you, Grechen. May you and your beautiful family stay safe and well. xoxox
Gretchen – First time poster, long time reader. Thank you for posting this!!! We must continue to shine a light and do the hard work to break down racism in this country. Gland that you will use your platform to highlight the work of black designers, bloggers and activists. We, white people must do the hard work to rid our country of racism.
Thanks for continuing to be true to yourself and your ideals.