Black Crane carpenter pants | mine are navy, black version
James Perse casual tee
Organic by John Patrick cardigan | very old…
No6 Clog wedges | sold out, black version on a higher wedge
Jas M.B. bag | old, sold out similar bag, new style
Yesterday’s outfit was a big f-you to the nasty voices in my head. The voices that say:
you’re only going to Whole Foods, why bother?
don’t wear those pants, they’re too weird.
your hair looks ridiculous pulled back.
black bag with navy pants?? GASP
it’s too much color.
I won’t even repeat some of the other things the voices said, except that they did also tell me not to buy the jelly beans and EAT THEM ALL ON THE WAY HOME, and I said f-you to that too. But that was actually the not-nasty voice, the one that wants me to feel good and be healthy. I get them mixed up sometimes…
But sometimes I choose to give the negative voices more power than the positive ones, because some days, it’s easier to believe them. Probably too many days lately, but I’m working on that.
Yesterday, I decided that I was going to wear these Black Crane pants again. It was the perfect day for them, 60’s, cloudy, so why not? And I’m still trying to convince myself to keep them. The shoes and cardigan also; they are all pieces I have been thinking it’s time to let go of, so I wanted to make myself wear them again, to see if I could get an emotional response one way or another. The jury’s still out, but this whole outfit is more high-school art teacher than I’d like, honestly. It might just be the shoes that throw it.
Anyway, I put the outfit on and kept my hair pulled back, because it’s long, and looks terrible down, and today I’m going for cut/color so I didn’t want to wash/style it. So lazy, I know. And when I looked at myself on the way out, I thought I looked good, comfortable, interesting, different – all ways I’m happy to describe myself.
And then the voices went CRAZY. Like, this is the suburbs, no one out here “gets” those pants. Change into jeans and a black sweatshirt. BLACK. You should be wearing black.
But I ignored the negativity, told it to take a hike, I am WEARING THE PANTS, and forgot all about it once I stepped out the door.
i agree with your description. this looks cozy! i hate those negative voices too. it’s true that we just need to tell that inner voice to shut up. easier said than done.
Those voices…As elusive as my goal weight. One day I’m dynamite in the dressing room with new jeans on and the next day I’m the fat girl…
You look great to me! I like your hair pulled back and always love black and navy together. Tell the voices to hush!
Good for you for not giving into the negative voices. I just read a post from Travelettes about how to achieve a bikini body and they suggested one thing: Put on a bikini. It’s better to feel comfortable in your own skin then let negativity dictate how you feel.
It makes me feel better to know that I’m not the only person who puts on anything but black or grey and worries that it’s too much color. 😉
Is it ok to say that I don’t dig the pants or cardigan? I’m not asking to be flamed or called a troll here, but I honestly don’t think the pants are doing you any favors. Same with the cardigan. It’s slightly marmish. I think it’s the sleeve length & dropped shoulders. Again, not working for you, but against you. I do agree with a previous commenter who said that outfit looks cozy though. I do dig the clogs though – but I’m a clog fan, which apparently makes me like 1 out of maybe 5 people in the world who loves clogs)
I can see you wanting to make the pants & cardigan work since you already own them/bought them, but sunk costs aside, why force it? These items don’t seem to spark any joy for you. If anything, these items seem to make you tense. Why unnecessarily put yourself through that? One of my fav sayings is to pick your battles carefully, not constantly. Might this cardigan & pants by a battle not worth fighting?
I actually like every piece that you are wearing! In addition to having one of those insecure days, I think it might just be the proportions of all these pieces together that created the “art teacher” effect you didn’t like. I think the pants would be great with a longer, slimmer cardigan or, alternatively, a more fitted top. And your Rachel Comey open-toe wedges or another less clunky high-heel would have balanced it out, too. And not too much color at all–I love burgundy and navy together, and black doesn’t count as a color. 😉 I absolutely love the texture on that cardigan, by the way!
haha! yes, absolutely it’s okay!! i’ll just say in response that i KNOW that the pants don’t do me any favors. honestly, what’s conventionally flattering on my body isn’t one of my first considerations when i get dressed. i think about it, definitely, but if the shape is interesting i’ll wear it whether or not it’s flattering.
but. you have a good point. and maybe i’m not “feeling” the outfit so much because it’s NOT more flattering. although i know that if i wear the pants with a fitted top it’s much better.
and there are more than 5 of us here who love clogs 🙂 you’re not alone!!
YAY to wearing what we like rather than sticking only to what is “flattering” i.e. slimming! I thought Into Mind made some good points in a recent post on this topic–the idea of selecting clothes that are “flattering” or only wearing certain silhouettes if you have a certain shape, etc. Yes, sometimes I want to look slimmer and for my legs to appear longer but sometimes I just want to feel like a badass and look like my average weight with my short legs, wearing my motorcycle boots and my long, drapey asymmetrical tops that I shouldn’t wear as a shorty. ;-P
Yeah, me too, Renza. Sometimes I want to be at my most flattering, “fashionista” best. Maybe for an important day, or an interview. But other days, I just feel creative, bohemian and free….and I want to wear baggy pants, a flowing peasant shirt or a big asymmetrical dress! We just have to “let our freak flag fly” when we’re feelin’ it. 🙂
I love it! It’s very indi-designer. And I love that your ponytail is no longer the “smallest in the world”! 😉
But you have to do what YOU feel is right for you. Could Jane have a point about the outfit not sparking joy? I’m trying to listen to that voice that tells me to “go for it” now that I’m dressing more consciously. And I think that comes with confidence. (I hope!)
ha! yes, i read that a while ago too, it’s so perfect 🙂
thanks for your comment, brooke! so happy to have discovered your blog – off to read more…
thanks beth.
always easier said than done, definitely…it has gotten somewhat easier to do though over time…
every time.
oh, it’s still pretty small!!
she does have a point, absolutely. when i can wear the pants with just a fitted top, they look better. but it’s still a struggle sometimes for me to wear them. primarily because they’re cotton flannel, though, there’s just not a long enough season for that mid-heavy-weight material here.
And here I am, looking for a pair of those pants or something like them that would fit me.
Life is too short to not celebrate our individuality!
preach !! 🙂
i have really short legs. yes, i know how to make them look a little longer, and i certainly know how to make them look shorter 😉 but that’s really not the most important thing to me. as much as my body, short legs, hips, butt, thighs, etc., frustrate me sometimes, i know now that i can’t change my general shape, and i certainly can’t grow any taller…so…i might as well embrace my short, thick legs. and wear whatever i want. as val said above, life’s too short.
but it’s also too short for me to spend so much time fretting about pants!! LOL
I just spent a week with a business colleague who wears completely the opposite color palette I do–bright colors, in the Tory Burch vein. One day I realized that the only item I had that was an actual color was my bright melon iPhone case, which happened to match her outfit that day (cardigan and shoes!).
that just hurts my eyes! in pure barre today, the instructor was wearing hot pink pants, red socks, a grey short with red on it and a leopard bra. made me anxious 😉
i loved the hot pink pants actually, because they’re awesome – they were these – and thought about trying them, but i’d wear them with black only!
I laughed out loud at your high-school art teacher comment. Hard.
Am I right though???
I actually love this whole outfit i think you look great. LOVE no6 clogs. Don’t think it’s. Unfkattering at all actually, quite the opposite. Funny how everyone sees things differently no?
Oops sorry for the crazy typos above but hope you got my point! On my phone ha!
“Let our freak flag fly” bwhahahah! I laughed so hard at this one line! Gonna so use that in a convo today if at all possible!
Every time I wear my clogs, the same people make the same sideways comments that results in the same outcome. Me chuckling a bit out-loud to acknowledge their comment so they get some satisfaction that they “won”, all the while I’ve mentally discounted their entire existence. So it’s a win-win or at best a draw.
A little David Crosby is good for the soul, Jane! 😉
I don’t think this outfit is unflattering at all, It’s actually one of my favourites you’ve posted lately! You look comfortable and happy. I love those pants on you, and combined with the tee/cardigan it seems like a perfect, comfortable, errand-running cafe-sitting outfit 🙂 Not super sold on the clogs with the outfit but that’s definitely not from a “flattering” point of view.. I’d be likely to wear sneakers with this which would be even less flattering! Haha. But yeah, I get your point about the limited wear-window of the pants, but I think they’re great.