SoLow cropped foldover leggings | size medium
CP Shades Carine top (same as the plaid top here) | mine is older, sold out, but here’s a white linen version, and a striped version at Revolve
Vince Blair haircalf sneakers | mine are from last year, the new version is “Berlin” – I’m not sure if the sizing is the same, although I’m guessing it is…size down 1/2 size
Alexander Wang Rockie with matte black hardware
Margot Wolf necklace
Since I’m getting worse and worse at having a “this week” or “last week” post up I thought perhaps I’d combine them with an outfit on Mondays. This gives me a good chance to get all of my random-ness out before the rest of the week!
Last week was sort of a blur, honestly; I felt all over the place most of the time. I spent the weekend learning and thinking about what is REALLY important to me, and how to get it. I’m not sure I’ve come to an ultimate conclusion, but I’m further along than I was. And I feel a little more focused this morning.
I have also decided to quit coffee for at least a month and see if that helps with the ups and downs a little bit. This is a VERY BIG DEAL for me, because I am a coffee fanatic. I relish my ritual in the mornings of boiling the water, grinding the beans and pressing down the plunger of my french press, all for the beautiful, dark, oily, thick cup(s) of coffee.
I know I’m addicted, and can’t do without coffee or else I’ll get a raging headache. But I’ve justified my 32-oz of coffee-a-day habit by saying that I don’t drink it after nine AM, I don’t need it the rest of the day to keep alert, and that it helps migraines & athsma. But lately I’ve noticed, especially on the weekends, that I get VERY tired immediately after drinking my coffee. And as I said, last week, I was so moody and really down in the afternoons.
I sort of chalk that up to being a little confused and conflicted about the direction of my life right now, but it is undeniable that caffeine has an affect on my body, and it may be time to try giving it up for a while. I did it before, but replaced coffee with green tea, but this time, I’m not going to replace it with other sources of caffeine; I’m going to try going without altogether.
I love coffee, and it scares me to think about not having it (as I sit here finishing off the press), but it scares me more that I might actually feel SO MUCH BETTER if I didn’t drink coffee and I wouldn’t try it because of my ritual and addiction. And that I love it, can’t I have JUST ONE VICE???
So, as soon as I use up the last of my beans I’m quitting. I know it’s going to suck, and be really hard for a few days, but hopefully it will be worth it, and I’ll be more “even” all day. I’m going to give it a full month, and be realistic about what happens to my body and mood. If I feel OMG SO MUCH BETTER, then I’ll stay off caffeine for good. If not, maybe I’ll bring it back in smaller amounts every once in a while. Or not.
This is actually a very big deal, now that I think more about it. Coffee is a huge part of who I am, or who I think I am; how I define myself. On Saturday mornings I sit down with my pot of coffee and my kindle and read until I can’t read anymore. During the week I sit with my coffee and browse the new arrivals at Shopbop.
But maybe it’s really NOT who I am. Can I be defined by my love/addiction to coffee? Not defined, but it’s something I enjoy very much. Obviously, I can draw a parallel here with my love of shopping, which is also something I think “defines” me and that I enjoy very much.
What I realize is that those are not the things that define me, they are just how my best qualities have manifested themselves. Who I am is made up of my love for reading, learning, teaching, helping, talking & sharing; all of which show up in my love of shopping & coffee. Now, I simply must take coffee and excessive shopping out of the equation, and still be ME.
I’ve done that with excessive shopping/buying (I think. So far.), so I can do it with coffee.
Have you given up coffee? or anything else you’re addicted to?