James Perse skirt
Lululemon top (I am CRAZY About this top. I got it on sale, but will get another one or two, and definitely pay full price. It’s long, and the sleeves are long, but it’s really flattering, and very comfortable)
Swedish Hasbeens clogs
Jerome Dreyfuss Billy bag with added long strap
Givenchy Hydra sparkling magic lip & cheek balm on my lips and cheeks – I LOVE THIS STUFF!!! it’s pretty intense when you first put it on, but balances out to the perfect shade of pink on your lips & cheeks. You only need to use VERY LITTLE.
First, an update: I am so excited about Everlane (and super-impressed with their customer service and that their social media manager reached out on my review post) that I placed an order yesterday for the cashmere cardigan & another v-neck tee, both in size medium. Believe it or not, I do NOT already have a black cashmere cardigan, so I’d been wanting to find a good, classic, affordable version for a while. As soon as it comes in, I’ll review it – I’m very interested to see how it fits/feels compared to Inhabit NY. Miss Sophie likes hers, so it must be wonderful
And now, a confession: I am going to be losing 50 pounds this year. You know of my struggles with weight and my body image if you’ve been reading for long, and while I do feel generally happy with the way my body is looking after nearly daily Pure Barre workouts, it’s time for me to bite the bullet and really get down to a healthier weight. And by that, I mean thin.
Please click through if you’re interested…
If I felt like I could really be happy and comfortable in my body 20-25 pounds over my “ideal” weight of about 115-120 for my height, then I would aim for that. I’ve actually been there, and my body tends to plateau at about 140 – it seems to be where I stop losing weight – but I don’t want to be overweight anymore. I want to feel thin, and light, and not have any extra fat get in the way of being able to do stretches and workouts that I want. I have been working SO HARD lately and have really noticed a difference in the shape of my body, but without losing the fat, while I do generally FEEL good, I don’t look the way I feel. I want to for ONCE in my life, look as good as I feel. I have NEVER been my “ideal” weight; and certainly never been thin. I have always been the biggest person in my Pure Barre class, in high school I was always bigger than everyone else – even in college.
Anyway, I am more and more concerned about my health, now that I’m 40, and I believe that I have family history on my side if I can get down to a low percentage of body fat, and a healthy weight. Both of my parents are thin, over 70, and they do not have any health problems at all. My grandfather was always thin, and he lived to be nearly 90. I do have heart disease in my family – my grandmother died before I was born at 50, but she was very overweight and smoked a lot, so I do feel like I can go a long way towards preventing that by losing weight. And I’ve never smoked…
My vet is adamant that my dog be kept just a little underweight because it’s better for his joints and his heart, and I’ve read articles and studies on humans living longer by calorie restriction and maintaining very low body fat percentage. I’m not going to go that far; I love food and I don’t want to live forever, but I do want to be as healthy as I can, so my body can at least fight harder as I get older. And I want to FEEL GOOD as I get older.
Why am I telling you all this? Because in a way, I’ve used this blog, my clothes, etc., as an EXCUSE NOT to lose the weight I need to. If I lose 50 pounds, I’ll look totally different; I won’t be a size 10-12-14 anymore – maybe a lot of you won’t be able to relate to my body type, or size anymore – I don’t want to lose that sense of camaraderie with you. I also like being one of the few fashion/shopping bloggers that’s a “normal” size and can relate to average-sized, curvy women. But I’ve come to accept that I’ll still be me – nothing will change except for my size – and although that’s a big change, it’s not everything.
I also LOVE most of my clothes and I hate the idea of not being able to wear them anymore. The idea of buying a whole new wardrobe is very daunting, but it will finally be my chance to create my “ideal” closet filled with only a few high-quality essentials – I’ll just have to be very careful to not go crazy buying everything that fits. (I’ve done that before)
Anyway, I’m looking forward to this journey, and taking it with you. I started David Kirsch’s “ultimate NY diet” yesterday which is a pretty intense low fat, high protein, low carb diet, and I hope to see results within 4 weeks. I’ve done Atkins before, which is similar, but definitely NOT low fat or low calorie, and saw results very quickly (which is crucial for me, if I don’t, I give up). I’ve tried everything over the years; I’m a pro at dieting, which is NOT something I’m proud of. After I lose the weight I need to, I’m finished dieting. I’ve finally been able to identify my problem foods and I know how I need to eat to be able to stay healthy. Which is not to say I’m not going to cheat every once in a while, but I’m tired of feeling physically bad after eating things that aren’t good for my body just because I can. Or want to. All my life, I’ve been defined by food – either what I’m eating, or what I’m not eating – and I’m SO tired of that. I want to be free of that once and for all, and now’s my chance. I know I can do it, for the first time, I know I can lose the weight and keep it off – something I was never able to do before.
Things are different now. I’m different now. Maybe it is just getting older – turning 40 seems to have done something to me; I feel calmer, happier and more optimistic about the future. I just finally want everything to be in sync; I want to FEEL and LOOK good. So, here goes…
Thanks for being here with me.