I am the luckiest person in the world. I can’t believe I get to be Hawk’s mom.
It’s true, but it’s also what I use to get myself up out of bed when I don’t think I can put my feet on the ground, or move my right hand. I had to work REALLY hard this morning to get up; I was in so much pain yesterday, and this morning when I woke up, my body was especially stiff, and my right hand/wrist where I have De Quervain’s tenosynovitis shot through with pain every time I moved it at all.
Things tend to improve once I get up and start moving a little, and have my coffee, but I miss the days I could easily get myself up and down out of bed, off the floor, the couch, etc. They will come again, I know. But some days, the pain is a lot to bear.
I AM NOT COMPLAINING. I can deal with all my various “issues,” I just wish I didn’t have to you know? No, I don’t mean I would go “back” in anyway, I just wish I didn’t have so much pain. Period. And maybe I would have liked to have known that my body might react this way, although I know that every woman’s pregnancy and postpartum experience is different. I didn’t read much (on purpose) about childbirth and postpartum, but I did read some, and nothing mentioned any sort of physical recovery or pain after about six weeks.
Of course, that might be because women who realistically talk about what happens to our bodies after giving birth are perceived to be ungrateful, or complaining.
WE are NOT complaining. We love our babies, but most of us have to pay a very high price for them; many women suffer much more than I am. But we deserve to be heard, and not judged for speaking about our experiences. At this point I am SHOUTING into the ether hoping that someone, somewhere out there has gone through what I’m going through and can sympathize. I am screaming for validation, to feel less alone. I imagine there are other women like me looking for the same, so I am happy to talk about what I live with every day if that helps another mother feel less alone.
I always share my experiences here because 1. it is a method of therapy for me, and 2. maybe it will help someone else feel less alone. I’ve been so happily surprised by how many of you relate to what I talk about here, even now, after posting so sporadically.
Every morning when I get up, put my feet down (in my Birkenstocks), and stumble to the bathroom through the shooting pain in my right heel and up my left sciatic nerve I remember a comment I got from a reader that she also got plantar fasciitis after pregnancy and it went away eventually. JUST KNOWING that helps me bear it. So thank you thank you thank you for that comment, and for everyone else who shares their experiences here and anywhere else. You have no idea how much it may help someone.
Happy monday !!!!
He is my absolute joy 🙂