James Perse dress | this one at Off Fifth is similar, but tucked, instead of ruched, and not double-layered
Birkenstock Arizona sandals
Admonish Bag | on loan to play with!
Dannijo necklace | sold out
Well, I go from one extreme to the other, don’t I? In case you forgot that I have a pear-shape (I sometimes do), here it is…in all it’s glory! The truth is it was still a bit cool to wear this alone, so I put a cardigan over it, but I wanted to show you the dress, so I took it off for the photo. And I will admit, I was more comfortable covering myself in this dress, which is very interesting, because it’s MY shape, MY curves and how this dress fits & accentuates them that made me buy it in the first place.
Which brings me to another issue, that is perhaps too deep for a Monday; my first impression of my “look,” myself, etc., is always positive. But the more I look – pass the mirror – analyze myself, my outfit, the faster it turns negative, and then I end up leaving the house wearing something different than what I started out wearing – or completely covering it up.
For me, what has worked was choosing what I wanted to wear by looking at it in my closet, putting it on, and keeping it on, no questions. I did that for a while (remember?) and I was very happy with it, but it was easy to stop doing, with all the recent stress of moving, losing Ozzie, etc. I know that everything in my closet is amazing, works together, and looks great on me; I’ve designed it that way!
But, as I am wont to do, I depend too much on how I feel that day, and how loud the negative voices in my head are, giving them too much opportunity to influence what I KNOW TO BE TRUE: that I look great (and am good enough) no matter what I’m wearing.
Heavy. Yes, but that is the truth. And my biggest fear. That I am not good enough, so I must create the impression – the perfect outfit – the perfect look – so that I at least APPEAR to be good enough. Which is the reason why I’m constantly trying to find the “perfect” thing. What is true is that I am already perfect – I don’t mean that in an arrogant way, of course – but spiritually, I am already who I am supposed to be. And I am good enough, just because I’m here.
Whoa. There it is…And now that I’ve named it, I can begin to conquer it. When you put words to your fear, and you bring it out in the open, it doesn’t have as much power over you. At least that’s what I’ve heard…!
So here goes. I don’t need the perfect pair of black pants anymore, or the perfect whatever…I just need to buy what I love (and less of it!!). I am already perfect.
Oh, and thank you everyone for the new blog suggestions on my Blogs we Read post – Already I’m inspired, especially by this latest post on Recovering Shopaholic on finding your ideal wardrobe size, and Janice’s personal exercise related to it on the Vivienne Files. I look forward to doing it myself and determining what my ideal wardrobe size is…I’m sure it quite a bit smaller than what it is now!!!