My body almost exactly 8 years ago, it looks different but it’s still mine…
OH MY GOSH. I was looking through old outfits, and this one struck me because
I got this SAME DRESS (in black) in for Slowre a while ago. So funny…
- What is your “body type”?
- What’s your favorite body part?
- What do you appreciate most about your body?
- What’s a particular frustration with your body lately?
- When do you feel best in your body? How do you move it?
I am short, about 5’3″ with a smaller waist, small bust, larger hips and thick legs. I think I’m a “pear” shape, but I’m not sure we use fruit shapes anymore? Maybe I’m a triangle? I am definitely not an hourglass LOL. I feel like my body type is so unique, I’d love to know how many of you have similar to mine. It’s not so unusual to have a small waist and larger hips, it’s my large legs/calves in combination with that that seems to be so unique. I know a lot of women who have small waists and wider hips, but they all have small legs, and shapely ankles (they’re more traditional hourglass shapes), which I think helps to balance the silhouette a little. Not that it needs balancing, but I hope you know what I mean. There’s nothing “wrong” with my body (I used to think so); it’s just a body, but I’ve struggled all my life with not EVER seeing women with the same body type as mine. I do every once in a while, but it’s pretty rare.
Favorite body part:
All of them. Sorry, that’s not allowed, you have to pick one! I think most of my life, I’ve loved my waist, because it’s small, and it’s the most “traditionally beautiful” part of my body, if you grew up with Western standards of beauty, that is. But now, it’s my legs. I’ve spent a long time (my entire life thus far) struggling with my thick legs, and hating them for being so BIG, and hard to fit into jeans and look the way I want them to. But I’ve made a conscious effort lately to turn that around and truly embrace them. My body is beautiful, as all bodies are, no matter their shape or size, but I haven’t quite reached the point that I would call my legs beautiful? I still have feelings LOL
That my legs are strong enough to get through a Pure Barre class, a ride on the Peloton, and get me around wherever I need to go. I try so hard not to take those things for granted because I understand how quickly that could change. Oh, and after my fractured jaw, I have a renewed sense of wonder at how my body can heal itself, and seem to handle almost anything I put it through…I appreciate it so much.
Haha…my legs. See how pervasive the “negativity” can be?? No, I accept my legs, and I appreciate them, it’s just endlessly frustrating buying pants/jeans that fit my legs, but not my waist or hips. I know by now that I will never look like “the models” in jeans, and I know better the styles that I can wear more comfortably, but that still never stops me from trying. I appreciate how strong and muscular my legs are, and if given the choice, I wouldn’t trade or change that for anything. Period.
When do you feel best?
Right after exercising or being very active. The last few days I haven’t really wanted to go to Pure Barre, but it’s not an option for me anymore (nor has it been for the last five years), so I go at my scheduled time and suffer through it LOL. And a Pure Barre class contains a lot of moments where I’m like WTF? How can I do that? Whoa, how did my body just do that?? Once it’s over, and this happens every.single.class. I am overwhelmed that my body just did that, and so grateful to it for getting me through to the other side haha. It’s the best feeling in the world. The best.
Just a final note…
I have struggled so much with body image issues and I won’t pretend to say that I don’t anymore. I have come a long way though, and mostly in the last few years. It amazes me constantly though, how our minds continue to be so influenced by what we saw and the types of bodies we were exposed to as young women and girls. It’s not exactly that I was force fed images of stick-thin models and specific standards of beauty, but there wasn’t a lot of body positivity messaging in the 70’s and 80’s (I played my Free to be You and Me record until it wore out, but I remember most the story about the boy who wanted to play with a doll, I can’t recall ever really feeling like I should be “okay” with my body; I was CONSTANTLY trying to change it).
From as early as I can remember I felt like I was the biggest person in all of my classes. I probably wasn’t. Or maybe I was. What difference does reality make anyway? It’s all about perception, and of course everything revolves around you when you’re a pre-teen/teenager, and even as a young adult. You see things very differently than they are. And everything is related to how you look, how “normal” you are, and how you fit in with the people around you.
One very disturbing thing that I used to catch myself doing was during movies/TV shows if a female character was suffering, or going through something emotionally, or sometimes physically difficult, I would say to myself, well at least she’s thin and “normal” looking. Like that made everything okay. I feel horrible even writing that down, and I wonder if I’m the only person who’s ever thought that. Probably I’m not. But that is what feeling bad about your own body does to a person.
Now that I am “thin” relative to where I’ve been in the past, I laugh at thinking that’s all there was to it. Like I truly thought it was going to be “Okay, now I have a “normal” looking body, or at least a more “socially acceptable body” so nothing can happen to me! Look at me, life is perfect! no death, no suffering” haha.. that is so fucked up it’s not even funny.
Anyway, I love how different we all are, and appreciate every woman’s body for what it is: a body housing essential organs – a vessel for movement. I enjoy dressing my body in things I think make it “look good,” of course, but that is not my obligation to society. I have no duty to look or dress a certain way, and I understand that now, but as a young women, that is not the message I absorbed.
I hope now, we can all have love and appreciation for every body, every person, but I understand how frustrating and difficult issues around body image are. And even when we can appreciate other women’s bodies, we have a hard time appreciating our own.
I just wanted to share my issues (again) so you might feel a little less alone with your own. It’s certainly not very “modern” to have body image issues nowadays (it’s a GOOD thing that there is so much body positivity going around, but I wonder how much of it is real??), but we all have room to grow I think, and shouldn’t feel ashamed, or wrong, for still having some complicated feelings towards our bodies 🙂